Superbowl XLVIII

Posted on February 3, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Before I get going, let’s talk about Roman Numerals. They’re pretty to look at, sometimes, but why complicate a simple number like 48? It’s not too difficult to figure out the number until you get to “40”, because “X’s”, “V’s”, and “I’s”‘ are pretty straight forward. Then at 40, they toss an “L” in there to confuse everyone. Forty is “XL” which means 50-10. No, it’s -10+50 because the X comes before the L. Then, when you get to 50, it’s just an L all by itself.

Using that logic, I think 1 thru 10 in Roman Numerals should be something like IXX, VIIIX, VIIX, VIX, VX, IVX, IIIX, IIX, IX, X. That way you get the X in play before you are allowed to use it all alone, just like the L.

I suspect Roman Numerals are used in conjunction with Super Bowl games as a link to gladiators times. They are kind of like warriors, after all. However, I’m pretty sure those playing pro football never considered leaving college early to join the military. Maybe it’s all about timing, or that there is no longer a draft.

The Draft should be resurrected. I mean, how is it fair that the only people getting killed in conflicts are volunteers? I thought we were an equal opportunity country. I think anyone running for any position in politics should be required to have served in the military before being allowed to run. Just a thought.

Yesterday I registered on a new website. After giving all the particulars we got to the security question questions to be used for access. One of the first ones on the list? … “What was the first name of your first boyfriend?”

I was stunned!

I’ve never been in a situation where that question was ever asked of me. I know, it’s 2014 and OK for anyone to have a boyfriend, even me, I suppose, but, I didn’t know what to do. There were lots of other questions I could have chosen, even one asking to know the first name of my first girlfriend, but I was stuck on boyfriend. There were three questions I had to answer, and that was a choice on all three. Getting passed that first question, however, was proving to be difficult.

Ultimately, after a long delay, I entered “Jack”, so I could move along. For the next question I chose girlfriend and entered “Jack”. For the third, I selected pet, and entered “Jack”. I’ve done this before, you see, to check if the program you’re working with is paying attention. Generally, in my experience, they aren’t. You can use the same word, or name, for all of the security questions and register just fine. If you do that, you won’t have to remember a lot of different things. On some web site registrations I’ve been born, and married, in the city of “Jack”. One syllable. Easy to remember. I suggest everyone use “Jack” for all your registrations from now on.

How many times do you think Peyton Manning said Omaha yesterday? I’m guessing it wasn’t as many times as “omygawd”.

Joining us to watch the game were Diane’s Mom, Jean, Jennifer, Lydia, Brianna, Haley, and Jeran. Cedric joined his friends at the Columbia Theater here in town to watch the game on the big screen. The kids’ youth pastor, James, took them and stayed through the first quarter. Then he joined us at our house until half time. He’s a really nice young man and the kids love him. Thankfully, he wasn’t at the house when Diane handed me a bowl of cashews and said, just as everyone quit talking, “here are your nuts.”

She rendered me speechless, not an easy thing to do. Making it worse was that I was the only male in the room of 7 people watching the game so it was pretty evident about whose nuts she was speaking. Worse yet, three of them were barely teenagers. And everyone laughed. I think Jennie started it when she snorted. Had I done something like that I would have been told to knock it off, or that it was inappropriate, something I hear a lot, but no one said anything to Diane. Even her mother laughed.

Now, about that game … #1 offense against the #1 defense, as it should be, and the #1 defense won. A new record was set, in the process, when Seattle scored 12 seconds into the game without ever touching the ball. Well, Peyton didn’t touch it either, so I guess he can’t be blamed. It doesn’t get much better than that, for me.

I actually like Peyton, but I’ve never liked Denver. That comes from years of living in Southern California cheering for the San Diego Chargers. Denver was the enemy during those years, and it’s never really gone away. Silly, I suppose, but that’s just the way it is. For the same reason, I have a Portland Trailblazer T-shirt the has “Beat LA” on it. Any Blazer worth his, or her salt knows that means “beat the Lakers.”

Back to Peyton … though I wasn’t looking for the thrashing Seattle gave Denver, it was gratifying to see they were up to the task. I admit I was a little disappointed when Denver finally scored, then made a 2-point conversion. Was that to prove a point? Like, “See, we can do it!”

In the end, going for that two points allowed watchers to witness virtually every way a team can score in a football game … it was like a clinic …

a safety
a kick-off return
a punt return
a pass
a run
a pick-6
a field goal
a 2-point conversion

Did I miss any?

For food, Diane made a big pot of taco meat which was used exclusively for DIY nachos. It was, as it always is, very good. I love nachos. Whoever invented those should get a bonus, or something.

We also had nuts, as I mentioned.

Justin Bieber, Golf, & Lunch

Posted on January 24, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Just a quick nod to JB, then I’ll get on to something worthy of discussion …

In my humble opinion this kid is an over rated human who needs to be deported back to Canada.

Let them deal with him.

Now for important “stuff” … Golf, and pretty much anything else than JB!

That’s what I did today with Doug, Junior, and Lyle. This Lyle is our local American Legion Commander and he’s commonly called “chief” because of his American Indian heritage. “Why,” you may ask, “does he allow people to call him that? I mean, think of the demeaning nature of being called ‘Chief’! How awful is that?” Well, bottom line is he’s perfectly OK with it. He’s responded to that name most of his life and he even writes that on his golf balls. Anyone who finds one knows the owner and returns it. Except for me. I keep them.

We all golfed pretty good, too. I even parred a hole, and had a couple of respectable bogeys. Nifty. Doug chipped in for a birdie on one hole and wound up beating me by 10 strokes. That’s not a difficult feat for him. I’ve discovered that I actually get better scores since I started counting all my strokes, as I go, instead of trying to remember after I’m done with a hole. what a difference.

Here’s a ‘selfie’ I took of the crew, left to right: Lyle, Junior, Doug, and me …

Here’s Junior teeing off on the third hole …

After finishing our game, we went to Fultano’s, in Scappoose, where Doug & Junior’s older brother, Jerry, and my older brother, Jack, joined us for a nutritious serving of salad for everyone but me. I also had pizza. Five pieces. And 1.5 large cokes. It was very filling.

Then I went home for a very brief time, then Diane and I returned to our church, Bethany Lutheran, where our plan was to make copies of the Annual Report we will need for Sunday. Sadly, I left the file I needed to copy at home. So we returned to get it. Then, back to church to deal with a copier always thinks it needs new parts, which it doesn’t, and it stops working when it gets too hot, which it did after only 17 of the 50 copies I was looking for. So, we packed up and went back home. Again.

I took the original file, scanned it to my computer to make a PDF file, then started printing the 33 copies we still needed. So far, as of this moment, I’ve done 15 of them. I would have had more, but while sitting here, watching TV, my printer over ran and spit three whole copies on the floor. They had to be collated, which took time because the paper covered about a 4 foot square area and didn’t really land in order.

On a lighter note, here’s Lydia in her Winter Ball uniform …

I find it interesting that she’s going to the Scappoose High School Winter Ball with a junior. I find that deplorable because when Diane was a freshman I was a senior. Lydia should have shot a little higher. But, her date, Wayne, is reportedly a good guy and he’s 6’3″ tall, able to provide ample protection should the need arise. He’s Cedric’s friend from church youth group. She will have a great time.

Still, she’s a St. Helens High School student who is going to the Scappoose High School winter ball. Diane and I find it sad that the old St. Helens vs. Scappoose rivalry isn’t like it used to be when we went to Scappoose High.

Now, I must quit, and make more copies.

Resolutions, Electricity, and Basketball

Posted on January 21, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Gee! Once again I’ve failed to honor my commitment to write something every day. This bothers me, a bit, because I’m sure there are hundreds of readers out there who are upset with me for this deficiency. I can only offer a little my Sad Sack apology that means essentially nothing, because it wouldn’t be totally sincere. I’m OK with it. Besides, I have an excuse.

Winter time, whether it’s really cold or not, is a particularly bad time for me because of all the static electricity. Unless I sit at the computer constantly, the contents of my brain spontaneous shoot out the ends of my hair, the little I have left, and stick to the walls and ceiling. Consequently, I don’t have many memories to share because I’m not allowed to sit at the computer all day long. And, if I did that, it would be pretty boring, since all I could write about would be, well, sitting here. Like this. With my hair in the air after the last static discharge …When the discharge is complete, my hair falls back in place, kinda, and my glasses turn black again. I’ve tried scraping the brain residue off the walls, so I could regain all that lost knowledge, but it’s hard to distinguish brain cells from paint and plaster chips. That, and it tastes just terrible. So, I’m learning to live with the loss.

This morning I went to the dentist again because I discovered that I still had some Social Security money remaining and I heard the doc purchased a new SUV and needed my help. So, it was one of those win-win things where he got money, without the need of hassling with an insurance company, and I got another tooth fixed. It was the one I chipped. Now it’s good as new.

Diane and I went to another one of Lydia’s basketball games and it was a good one. They lost, but only by 4 points after coming back in the last 5 minutes from 15 down. It was pretty exciting to watch them get their act together. Now for a qualifier … the St. Helens JV team is probably the only one in the league that doesn’t play varsity players in the first half. As a result, they are normally playing from behind in the second half. Sometimes they don’t recover anything, but tonight they did. Tomorrow they play against Scappoose, in St. Helens, because the Hood River High School doesn’t have a JV team. That kinda confused me for a while until it clicked that the coaches must have talked and viewed it as an opportunity for the Scappoose and St. Helens JV teams to get a workout. Should be fun.

Before leaving for the game this evening, Diane showed up with the mail and gave me the turn signal switch I ordered for the old truck. Got a new lever, too. I plan to install it tomorrow, then I’m driving the truck to the dump so I can empty it. Might even clean the crap out of the cab while I’m at it.

Hope everyone had a good day.

Urine & Mean Drivers

Posted on January 18, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Yesterday I went to the local dialysis clinic to see my Kidneyologist. It was just a followup to check on a diagnosis I received many years ago about my kidneys and how they were behaving badly at that time. I had teeny, microscopic little bits of blood in my urine and it was deemed to be a bad thing. So, I’ve been taking blood pressure meds for the last 15 years, or so, to help deter the blood leakage.

Sadly, the meds don’t help with urine leakage but I don’t mind. Diane might, but I don’t.

My kidney guy is Dr. Smiley and I really liked him. He sent me to the lab for a urine test which I passed with flying colors. I didn’t spill even one drop! I was directed to place it on a table in the lab, which I did, but not before getting the attention of the young lady who gave me the bottle and those directions. When she noticed me, I held up the little bottle, said “cheers,” put it down and walked off. She nodded knowingly.

Thinking about urine makes me wonder how pretty much everyone in the world knows that it’s very salty. Why is that?

Next, I’d like to address all of you who find it necessary to drive in the fast lane, all the time. In Oregon there is an un-enforced law that everyone must drive to the right unless they are going to pass. Lots of people don’t do that, of course, and in our small corner of the world it poses a problem.

Highway 30 is a nice 4-lane road all the way from Portland thru Columbia City. That’s about a 30 mile stretch of road on to which many, many people must make a left turn in order to get where they wish to go. There’s a chicken lane in the middle that helps facilitate the turn, but the fast lane drivers create a situation where left turners must stop and wait for an opening. Most of the time the slow lane is open, no one in it, but these folks just don’t see a need to move over, to be a courteous driver, allowing left turners to merge. Nope, they just edge a little closer to the chicken lane as if daring drivers to edge into “their” lane.

I bring that up because it happened this evening. This time it was a large, gray-fuzzy-haired woman, but we’ve seen all kinds. Mostly, they are young, and don’t care. Diane and I always drive right to ensure we don’t impede those who need to turn. But, then, we’re special.

Those of you who live in high density areas may not see the problem since you have divided highways and traffic lights for cross roads all over the place. That’s not true, here. Much of that 30 mile stretch is through countryside, past farms and such. So, it’s a crap shoot to make a left turn. Sometimes it’s pretty exciting, especially when you’re the passenger, as I always am, and prone to be at the point of first contact should a collision occur.

Jack and Wynette know exactly what I mean. In order to access Highway 30 coming from their house, the traffic gods must all be in accord to afford them an opportunity to cross both the southbound and northbound lanes. Actually, it’s eastbound and westbound, but when you look at a map it’s really north and south. It doesn’t really turn west until you get to Rainier.

OK. That’s all I’ve got. Now I must go eat the weenie Diane heated up for me. In the microwave. I got soup, too.

Things With Engines and Golfing

Posted on January 16, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Now that I’m older, it’s becoming apparent that I have absolutely no business, at all, having more than a couple of pieces of equipment with internal combustion engines. There are multiple reasons for that revelation, but the most important one was issued by Diane. She told me we had too many of them and should divest ourselves of those not deemed essential.

When this was pointed out to me, I got to looking around, and was astounded by the reality of that observation. I never gave it any thought during the collection process and now I have eight (8) pieces of equipment that require attention to ensure they run when I want them too. This takes time and effort I don’t really want to expect right now because I have other important things to do, like finish the baseboards in the house.

Still, the engines call to me, and require attention to ensure they will start on demand. Sadly, they require more attention than I’ve been giving them and they’re getting older, like me, and require more attention. I suppose that’s like me, too, if you ask the right person. So, I’ve been working on these things with motors, except for the weed whacker and lawn mower, getting them running so the oil can be moved around a little.

To get the engines to turn over makes it necessary to ensure the batteries are fully charged. This is an ongoing effort because they reside in vehicles that don’t have their electrical circuits stimulated very often. Once charged, the effort to achieve ignition is limited only to the proper flow of gasoline. Within minutes, usually, the engine starts and I let it run for a while before turning it off to await the next time I find it necessary to fire it up. As of today, I’ve managed to start seven of them, and I’m confident the eighth won’t be a problem. It doesn’t get started very often because it doesn’t have a battery installed. I need to put one in place each time I want to turn it on. That will happen tomorrow. Maybe. Unless it rains.

Today, instead of doing real work all day, I went golfing with my friends Doug, and Junior. Prior to that, however, I had coffee with the MELCA group at the Kozy Korner. They do that every Thursday morning at 0900. In attendance were Ross, Larry, Larry, Everett, and Loren. We talked for an hour, drinking coffee non-stop, solving many of the worlds problems, then I had to excuse myself so I wouldn’t be more than 10 minutes late for my golf date with Doug and Junior. And Lyle, too.

As planned, I arrived at 1010 for our 1000 tee time. Doug and Junior rode in a cart while Lyle and I walked. It was a good day. We all golfed well. I even parred one of the holes, and I had the highest score, so I won. I had a 54 and the other three only had 53’s. Go figure that. That’s for nine holes, and the best I’ve ever done. Most of the time I’m over 60 which is important because it keeps my handicap nice and high.

After golfing we went to lunch at Burgerville. I had to do that because Diane told me to. She was going shopping and had already eaten her lunch. I had a Tillamook Cheesburger basket and it was awesome. I usually just get a simple Double Cheesburger but this time felt a need to ingest a slice of tomato and some limp lettuce.

I hope everyone had a good day. Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to report some major progress on the baseboard project.

I hope.

Winter Golf and BLTs

Posted on January 4, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

I regret not getting something posted yesterday. Because of that I’ve already failed in my unspoken goal of posting every day in 2014. Therefore, I can pretty much relax the rest of the year because my other goal, of not gaining 125 pounds this year, is a relatively safe one. I may, however, make it up by posting multiple times one of these days.

Though I’m sure everyone finds that bit of information incredibly interesting, I must move on to more important issues. One of those is the weather.

The Mid West and East Coast are getting pummeled with terribly cold storms due, no doubt, to global warming. It has to be that. In stark contrast, we here in normally rainy Oregon are the recipients of some unseasonably beautiful days. Even the flowers think it’s time to rise and shine. Daffodils are popping up all over the place. Then, today, just because we could, Doug, Junior, and I went golfing. The 4th of January in Oregon and we went golfing!

Sure, there was frost everywhere, and the roads were very slick on the sections that hadn’t yet seen the sun, and the greens were cement hard, but it was a good day. I had my best round of the year. It wasn’t a particularly good one, but it was my best one so far and guaranteed to ensure my handicap remains one of the highest allowed. Here’s what we had to contend with …

The vest stayed on during the entire game. So did the driving gloves I decided to wear. They worked better than the golf glove I usually wear, when I remember.

This was interesting … it’s a line of frost going directly away from the hole which was in the shadow of the pin. Pretty cool.

Here’s Doug contemplating whether to get his putter or just finish out the hole with his 5 iron.

It’s just too nice for words …

Like normal, Doug and Junior got to the course before me and already had a cart. Normally, they would get one for me, too, and we’d split the cost for both three ways. This time, however, they didn’t do that. They told me they thought I preferred to walk, which I did the last couple of times because I need the exercise. So, they made me walk the entire course, in the cold, knowing my feet were getting all wet as the frost melted. Oh, they tried to get me to ride with them, by standing on the funning board and holding on to the little golf cart chicken bar, but I declined. Doug did his best to make me feel bad about it by driving slowly along side of me as I struggled from hole to hole, but I didn’t let him get to me. I toughed it out. I might not be able to walk tomorrow, but I did it.

After we finished with golf, we made up and were tentatively going to Sunshine Pizza for lunch. I got permission from them to invite Diane, but she replied that she had made BLTs for us. By “us”, I mean Diane and me. That was a lunch date breaker. I love BLTs so I went home. On the way I stopped at cousin Don’s house to wish him a Happy New Year, and had the added pleasure of greeting Herb and Christy, too. Herb is Don’s best friend who lives just across the street. Christy drives car #44 at the track. All these folks are gear heads and I’m just a wannabe one of those.

I got home and Diane constructed my sandwich. I gotta tell you, this is the BLT of all BLTs. Even though I chipped one of my front teeth on it, it was awesome.

Now we’re kicked back on the couch watching the Philadelphia Eagles play the New Orleans Saints in a wild card bid for the NFL playoffs. We’re rooting for the Eagles because their coach is Chip Kelly who is the ex-Duck coach. He’s finishing his first year as a pro coach and is doing pretty good.

Now it’s time to stop, but I have to share my favorite quote from one of the movies being advertised on TV. I don’t know what the name is, but it has a guy who said, “lick me all over till I shine like a trout.”

I already know I’m going to love that movie.

Gilligan, Baylee, and Jeran

Posted on December 28, 2013 by Jerrie Cate

Now that Christmas is over we look toward next week and the dawning of a New Year. 2014! Thinking back to when I wore much smaller clothes, 2014 wasn’t part of my vocabulary. Heck, neither was 1970. It was just too far out there to be a concern. It’s not a concern now, either, just more like reality making me thankful that I’ve actually made it this far in life. I got to see many of the Buck Rogers things of my youth become reality, we went to the Moon, saw photos sent from Mars … how cool is that? Old news, I know, but still pretty nifty.

The past few days have been very relaxing, giving us time to pause and reflect on things past. That doesn’t take very long for me since I can’t remember much, but it was a fun effort. Diane helps me along with hints until I guess correctly which makes me uncommonly joyful. We do this every day, so it isn’t something new for her. Deep down I know the answers, but keying on her hints makes her happy, especially when I’m right. Makes me happy, too.

Yesterday we received Gilligan and Baylee for their first overnighter with us. Gilligan has stayed before, but when she’s alone with us things are pretty boring. We understand that. So, when they both came it was a really good thing as they each had company with common interests. Here are their adorable selves, sitting at the counter playing with Polly Pockets … Gilligan is the poser on the left.

Making it even better, Jeran skipped going to the movie with his family so he could stay and play with his cousins. He had planned to be here anyway, but initially considered the movie, then opted to spend his weekend with us. The girls were thrilled and they all had a terrific time. Jeran is great with them. Here’s Jeran as he watches “The Sound Of Music” snuggled under my blankie, without permission, but it’s OK.

Baylee crashed and burned around 2030, then Gilligan at 2130. Jeran lasted a bit longer. It’s good they went to sleep so easily, and fairly early, but that just meant Saturday morning was an early one. Like 0600 for Diane to mediate. Jeran wisely stayed in bed until around 0930. Me? I don’t remember.

After a simple cereal breakfast the girls were sequestered in Diane’s bathtub with some Avon roll on soap. Blue for Baylee, Red for Gilligan. They each got a vintage Barbie doll to play with, too. They had a good time and didn’t splash all the water out of the tub, just like we asked them not to. After an appropriate amount of time, Grams went in and scrubbed them clean, then shampooed every hair on their heads, one at a time. It didn’t take as long as I thought it would until she told me it was one “child” at a time, not one “hair” at a time.

When everyone was out and dry, I was alerted that the tub wouldn’t drain and required my handy hands. This isn’t my first encounter with the non-draining tub, so I knew exactly what was wrong. Hair. Lots of long hair. It is my belief that whoever designed the tub plug was bald because his complicated mechanism restricts draining water even when it’s pristine clean. I would have taken a picture of it but I know Diane would have objected. It looked kinda like the fur ball Panzee barfed up last summer. Really, it did. Here’s what that looked like … don’t look if you have a week stomach because it’s pretty gnarly …

First, however, here’s the kind of drain I must deal with …

Now, Panzee’s fur ball … if you were quick enough, I had a photo here, but Diane was seriously upset that I published it. I must admit it probably wasn’t the best move I’ve made this year, but had to do it. Now it’s just gone.

The cereal was just a primer for the girls. For an encore, Baylee, who barely eats anything here, had a scrambled egg, another bowl of cereal, a cup of milk, and an M&M Cookie. Grams made french toast for Gilligan and I added a scrambled egg for her. Jeran ate cereal, two scrambled eggs, and a piece of jelly toast. I had a bagel, Diane had a fried egg, and jelly toast. The animals didn’t eat but Breezie took a shot at an agile hummingbird. Thankfully, she missed.

Now I must go reconstruct Diane’s mixer (the parts arrived yesterday) and see if it works. The coffee maker at church has also been reassembled with the new parts, in case I didn’t mention that in a previous post, like you really care. The coffee maker works perfect and delivers a full pot, every time, and I only got shocked once.

Hope you all have a nice quiet Saturday which isn’t likely if you either like football or live in a house with someone who does.

Cheers.

Merry Christmas

Posted on December 25, 2013 by Jerrie Cate

The day is done, and it was a busy one. Actually, it’s been pretty busy the past few days, but that’s OK with us. Busy is good.

The sad news for today is the loss of a good friend’s Mother. Mabel passed on this afternoon at the tender age of 95. Please help us heap blessings on Daughter Nancy, Granddaughter Lisa, and their families to help them through this trying time. Mabel will be missed, but not forgotten.

Sorry to start out with bad news but, ya know, life is funny like that. It’s unpredictable and keeps us all wondering what’s going to happen next. Sometimes it’s exciting, some times it’s not.

Yesterday was extremely busy for Diane and me. We got up late, like normal, then went to First Lutheran Church, here in St. Helens, to assist with the annual Boy Scout sponsored event that provides hot Christmas meals to hundreds of people, all delivered to the recipient’s door. Bill, the head “Scout Guy” in the area, said the event isn’t advertised and help isn’t requested, but there are always plenty of helping hands who show up to make it work. This year was challenging because the scouts had to move from one staging area to another for political reasons. So, a process that has been in place for years had to be re-engineered to work from a much smaller facility. It worked out nicely.

My humble part was initially unwrapping and separating rolls into defined numbers determined by the number of people in each family receiving a meal. Lots of ones, twos, threes, etc., and a couple of twelves. Diane and I were doing the separating and Lydia was wrapping faster than I could unwrap. But, we got it done and ended with one table full of newly wrapped rolls. Another lady parceled out patties of butter into stacks for each group of rolls. In hindsight, we figured it would have been better if we’d’ve wrapped the patties with the rolls. This was determined after I dropped quite a few of them while transferring them to the distribution table. It was because of the slippery gloves I had to wear. Really.

From rolls duty I was sent to help fill vegetable plates and pass them on to the wrapper. Part of the time that was, again, Lydia who gave me a little grief for not keeping up with her. She’s pretty quick, and she’s a very hard worker. Diane was out doing other “stuff”, like cutting and boxing up individual pieces of pie, and I know she did a ton of other things but I was wrapped up, so to speak, in my task. Tunnel vision, you know. I do know that she, Daniel, and the kids made numerous trips around town delivering meals to many people. It’s time-consuming but very humbling to be part of this effort.

Once the veggie plates were done someone saw me taking a break and sent me to the kitchen where I was put on mashed potato and gravy duty. This involved three huge, like 10 gallon pots sitting atop an electric range. Two of the pots had boiling water into which were placed semi frozen packages of mashed potatoes, five bags to a pot. In the packaging area was a steam line with potatoes, beans, dressing, and gravy, two of which were my responsibility to keep filled. Behind me, on the prep table, Terry and Vern were ripping up turkeys and ham and placing portions in containers for delivery. I never figured out what a portion was because it was done using the “BGBG” method. That means, By Guess By Golly. The ‘cutters’ filled the containers by hand, literally, using the zen approach. A handful to them, I suspect, filled the needs of “x” number of adults and kids. It seemed to work until we started running out of meat. Then portions got more normal, but they were still generous portions.

For me, the potatoes were renewed numerous times, I burned off all the fingerprints of both hands multiple times, and I kept the gravy train rolling. That huge pot almost got empty once, then I had to make up a recipe for a new pot. Never having made that much gravy at one time, it was interesting, and I have no idea how it tasted. To make it I used all the stock salvaged from turkeys that were delivered by volunteers throughout the afternoon, and some pre-mixed thickener which was, I’m sure, stock and flour. Whatever it was worked OK and we wound up with just enough to finish the job, I think. I don’t know for sure because I had to leave as things were winding down to prepare for our choir responsibilities at our church. That was happening at 2100. In all, Diane and I both spent almost 7 hours working non-stop, along with dozens of others doing the same. It was gratifying.

Our service was OK, but Pastor got a little carried away with video clips which many people, including us, didn’t think was appropriate for the service. I know, we have the technology, so why not use it, right? True, but there’s something to be said about tradition, and last night was about as far from tradition as one can get. Jean, our organist, was particularly upset because the service had “Joy To The World” at the beginning instead of the end. Until last night the choir has always marched out singing “Joy To The World” to end the service, following the Acolytes after they extinguish the candles. It was just wrong, ya know? The choir was great mostly because I didn’t sing very loud. I’m sure that would have ruined it for sure.

After the service we dropped Diane’s Mom at home because it was after 2300, then went to Daniel & Jennifer’s home to watch the kidlets open their gifts. This is our own tradition, and it will not change. For a while, at least. By the time we got home it was well after midnight and we were dog-tired, as old people tend to be when they stay up that late. So, Diane and I exchanged our gifts and went to bed. I got a new pair of Nike Air sneakers, and Diane got a nice little flashlight for her purse. We were both pleased.

This morning the dogs, not caring how little sleep I got, made me get up at 0715, about 5 hours after laying down. Then I napped until mid morning when Diane needed my help to get a 21 lb turkey in the oven. People were told they could show up anywhere from 1200 and beyond, as their desires dictated. It was going to be a ‘simple’ affair, buffet style, right? Right! In addition to the turkey there was a very large ham, all the pieces that go with a holiday meal, including some an awesome sweet potato and yam casserole from Wynette. I’ve never had that before and it was great. J&W brought that as well as their very welcome company. It wasn’t ‘simple’ by any means. As I may have mentioned before, I’ve learned to just stay out of Diane’s way and respond to help when beckoned. If not beckoned, just stay out of the way and don’t talk. Oh, I did make a double batch of fudge which actually turned out pretty good although I used too much butter, on purpose. I just didn’t want to figure out what 1/3 of a cup was. I used too much sugar, too, but that was OK because the recipe calls for almost an entire can of condensed milk for a double batch. So, instead of tossing out what little remains I used it all, like Jack said he does, and added an extra cup of sugar. It’s pretty good.

The meal went on throughout the afternoon, the middle of which we retired to the rearranged living room to watch old slides of years past, before digital cameras. I was pleased that they are all still in pretty good shape and we all enjoyed seeing ourselves all dressed up in younger people’s clothes, with more hair and skinny bodies. Our children, Jeff and Jennifer, were especially pleased to see the pictures of themselves as babies in foreign countries. Jeff was born in Rome, Italy, and Jennifer was born in Agana, Guam. About as far apart in the world from each other as you can get, I suspect. I set the screen up in front of the big screen TV which wasn’t on at all today. We just visited, watched slides, laughed, and laughed. It was an exceptional day of remembrance for us.

Now it’s over and I must retire. It’s almost 2300 and Diane’s already gone that direction. We had our entire family gathered around us one more time, and we feel blessed.

We hope you all had a wonderful day and that the spirit remains with you throughout the year.

Peace, Love, and Joy to you.

Diane’s Birthday & Little Kids

Posted on December 20, 2013 by Jerrie Cate

On this day, a few years ago, Diane was born at Emanuel Hospital in Portland. I think her Mom was in the same room my Mom was a few years earlier when I was born in the same hospital. Maybe we even had the same doctor and he created the link between us the allowed us to find each other and know the search was over.

Diane has weathered the years far better than I have. Some of you might think that it’s because she knows how to use makeup better than me, but you’d be wrong. I know how to use makeup just fine. It’s just that she hardly uses any at all. Still others may think it’s because she’s been pampered her entire married life, and you’d be correct. I pamper her to the point where she gets really tired of me doing things for me and tells me to leave her alone. I’m finally starting to get the message and we’re getting along much better now. Finally, after all these years. Truth is, I’m very lucky she spent the time to coach me through the rough parts. And, she raised our kids pretty much all by herself since I was gone a lot during their formative years. She was the boss and disciplinarian who got results. Not me. For all that effort I will be forever grateful to her. For that, and for agreeing to marry me and embark on that journey.

To celebrate the day we (Mom, Me, Diane, Jack, Wynette, Daniel, Jennifer, Cedric, Lydia, and Jeran) had an early dinner at Fultano’s in Scappoose. We spent two hours visiting and laughing. Jennie gave Diane a card that made her cry. Jennie knows how to do that. I have a photo to prove it, but it’s hidden somewhere in the ‘cloud’ and I can’t find it. I will, eventually, then I’ll add it. We all had a good time, as we tend to do whenever we all congregate. Jeff, Heather, and their children were missing from the party because they had a previous engagement, but they came by the house later, after we got home.

Regarding that visit … my namesake, Jerrie Anne, is a busy little person. She, Gilligan, and Baylee came in full of energy, but the older two listen to reason far better than she does. Anything below 4 feet off the floor is fair game for Jerrie. She’s good about giving up what she picks up, but she doesn’t hesitate to grab something again right away, over and over. It’s a fascinating quest of discovery for her and an arduous, tiring effort for whoever has the energy to keep track of her. I tried it for a while but quickly discovered that it’s really good I’m not placed in a position where I must do it long, and often. She’s a lot like Jennifer in her actions at the same age. I applaud Jeff and Heather for the energy they expend to keep all their kids safe and happy.

I’m getting more tired thinking about it. So, I must stop.

Happy Birthday, Sweetheart.

Coffee Pot, Mixers, and Sizzler

Posted on December 16, 2013 by Jerrie Cate

So … I managed to totally dismantle the church’s Bloomfield Integrity Model 9012 Coffee Maker, right down to the last bolt and screw. I was really proud of myself and it was especially fun when I showed Diane all the innards, where the water circulates before filtering through the coffee grounds. Really gnarly. Knowing this, would you drink coffee that was made using this machine?

Herein lies the true value of a coffee ground filter. However, I’m guessing that from now on many of you may seriously question little chunks of stuff you find in your coffee. Don’t just assume it’s coffee grounds. Me? I’m OK with it. Doesn’t bother me at all. I figure it’s just as good as taking a calcium pill once or twice a day. What could it hurt? Especially if the coffee is laced with Italian Sweet Cream creamer. As I tippy tap across my keyboard, all those parts are soaking in the sink in a mixture of vinegar and baking soda. The chemical reaction is churning all those particle loose and will probably, also, dispose of the liquid wrench I had to use on some of the extra tight fittings.

Then there’s Diane’s mixer. It’s a Kitchen Aid that we’ve had a long time and it’s served us well. So, it’s worth it for me to at least attempt to fix it. That, and fixing things is just something I enjoy doing. OK. Trying to fix things is something I enjoy. Actually, taking them apart to see what makes them tick is the best part. Sometimes I just take things apart, see what’s going on, then put it in a box and hide it in the basement. It’s always fun when I find it, sometimes years later, and try to put it back together. The challenge begins when I come up with missing parts that were removed to fix something else. When that happens it all goes back in the box for another day.

Anyway, here’s what the inside of a Kitchen Aid mixer looks like. I was amazed at the amount of grease covering the gears, right over the top of the mixing bowl. Tasty.

This afternoon, as planned, Jack and Wynette stopped by so we could all carpool over to Sizzler in Longview for lunch. You may have heard me mention it before because it’s a favorite trip for lunch after church. I cannot recall ever going to Sizzler on a week day, so this was special. It was a food oriented celebration of 51 years of wedded bliss for J&W. They would have gone yesterday, but it was foggy. Like normal, we had an extremely good, laugh a minute, time. The food was just a bonus because we’ve had many extremely good times just visiting in each other’s living rooms. Unlike Sundays, Sizzler didn’t have the monstrous fried chicken legs, just the wings. They were still good, and I ate six of them, but I missed my legs. Love those things. I had a taco, and two servings of spaghetti, too. Then, when I went to get dessert, Jack told me that Diane said to “surprise” her with a dessert, so I did. I got a soup bowl and filled it with at least a pint of ice cream, then buried it in chocolate and butterscotch topping. I had to set the bowl on a plate because it was almost running over the edge. Diane was surprised and, I suspect, won’t ask me to do that again. I wound up eating a lot of it after I went back to get her some bread pudding.

The day isn’t quite finished, yet, as Diane is going to visit her Bunco Babes at 1900 and I have a Lions Club board meeting at 1900. I’ll be home shortly after 2000, but she won’t make it until 2200, or so. That leaves me home alone for a couple of hours.

I think I’ll paint something.