Church Meetings vs. Football

Today ended a phase in my life that I never thought would arrive. That would be the end of my extended stay on our Church Council. It’s a 3-year term and I’ve been on it for 6. I’m not the only one. My friend, Bill, also saw his 6-year stint end today and I know he’s pretty happy about that.

Now, I suppose you’re thinking that because I looked forward to getting off council that I don’t see the need for people to stick their arm in the air to volunteer, or to at least accept the challenge when nominated during the annual meeting. That’s what we had today. Our annual meeting. Due to a hazardous conflict many years ago, the council decided to NOT have our annual meeting on Super Bowl Sunday.

That wasn’t a good meeting and we learned a valuable lesson … if you want a quorum at any kind of church meeting, do it when there’s not a foot ball game on TV. Any football game, but especially the Super Bowl.

Now I have to figure out what I’m going to do with all my time since I won’t have to attend those monthly meetings.

Maybe I’ll just take a nap, or something.


Cortisone and Furniture

We were driving home from a doctor’s appointment for me at which I received a cortisone shot in my right shoulder. I have complete tears in both rotator cuffs, but they happened so long ago that surgery really isn’t an option. So, I get shots.

About half way home my lovely wife asked me how I was feeling. She actually said that, “How are you feeling?”

Giving it a little thought, I concluded that I felt pretty good, and said, “I feel pretty good. There’s no pain.”

She quickly replied, “Good. Let’s go home and move furniture.”

Because of that I figured there wouldn’t be any need to attend the recommended physical therapy sessions.

OK, I lied …

What’s new, huh? My last post was sent in a moment of weakness when I was feeling a little low about something inconsequential, like a pending doctor’s appointment, or something like that where the potential for terrible news was possible. I did have a few doctor’s appointments overt he past few weeks, but I wasn’t concerned about any of them because I typically not concerned about anything at all. I’m Mr. Stress Free about everything. Really, I am. Ask anyone.

I don’t worry about ISIS, which, by the way, I choose to pronounce “is is” instead of “ice iss” just for fun. World events seem to have a way of evening out in the long run, kinda like the stock market, if you just leave things alone. That, and there’s always Karma to fix the wrongs in the world.

For that same reason, I’m not even a little bit concerned about the upcoming presidential election because I figure things will be very interesting no matter who gets into office. I also feel that things won’t change much regardless of who wins.

I do feel, however, that if Trump somehow wins we will revert to a society where “Political Correctness” will become a thing of the past. It will be OK to function without worrying about whether of not all your filters are functioning properly. That’s my perfect world, as most of you might have guessed. I have a hard time applying filters to my words or actions. Life’s way more fun that way. Ask Donald.

If any of the other candidates win it will be business as usual because they’re all career politicians. Those should be prohibited, disallowed, against the law. It should be six-year terms max then it’s time to leave, not rally for another term.

I don’t think there should be an age limit on any positions, either. I figure if a person can either ride a bike, or roller skate, they qualify. If they can do both, better yet.

All office holders should write their own speeches or, like Donald, just share whatever is on their mind at the time in response to any question. It’s just more fun that way.

Strictly my opinion, of course.

Also, to stay in line with my normal conduct, I’m not going to edit the above except to correct spelling errors this program detects. It is what it is. I might read it again in a couple of days, or next week. Maybe. If there is anything too outrageous, I trust those who read it to let me know so I can consider fixing it.

On the fun side of life, I’ve been golfing twice this year already. Junior and I went out on January 1st, and again last Friday, the 8th. I’m happy to say that I did pretty well both times. Our plan is to continue going out once a week, weather permitting, until one of us dies. Now that’s a commitment. Doug was unable to join us because he’s still training his new fake knee and it’s proving to be a difficult process. So, everyone send Doug good thoughts to help get him through the healing process.

Me and Junior ready to tee off.IMG_2836

This was our view looking back on the 5th fairway. Mt. St. Helens looks good.IMG_2838This is what happened two days later.


Another fun day was last Thursday when Cedric asked me to go with him and his Dad to the Navy recruiter. It appealed to me because the last time I went to a Navy recruiter was in 1962. I thought it would be interesting to see what’s changed. I say that as if to indicate I can remember that last visit. Not likely, but I can guess.

The recruiters we met were great in all respects and put Cedric at ease right away and made it a really good experience. All I did was shoot the breeze with them and share a few stories of what it was like being in the real Navy all those years ago. It was a fun visit, and Cedric is on the way to being a US Navy Sailor. The tradition continues. To expand on that a bit, Lydia is working through the process of applying for an appointment to the Naval Academy. Nothing firm there, yet, but I’m looking forward to that, too.

I hope everyone is enjoying the new year as much as I am.

So far it’s pretty good.

I’m done here …

After making hundreds of posts of the past years, I believe it’s time to quit. The reason is mainly because I find myself trying to think of something witty to write that I think someone may find humorous. It used to be that I wrote simply to purge my brain but now days I fear that purging my brain may result in serious complications regarding personal hygiene. So, I’m not going to do it any more.

In the future, if I feel compelled to share something, I will do so via Facebook.


Medicine Warning Labels

After listening to all the warnings at the end of advertisements for various medicine, I’m concerned that they aren’t nearly comprehensive enough. Many thing are missing and I would like the folks that write all that stuff to consider some of these, which I may or may not have experienced personally.

Don’t take this medication if you are currently in the third hour of a 4-hour erection, plan to urinate but can’t, didn’t plan to urinate but did, have had loose stools for more than a week, have trouble sleeping on the floor, plan to have a heart attack within a week and half of becoming pregnant or impregnating someone.

You should stop taking this medicine if you experience a rapid heart beat while eating peanuts, a sudden urge to insert green grapes in your nose, spontaneous alopecia, aversion to puppies and kittens, the urge to damage yourself with dull butter knives, everything smells like urine, your ears bleed for no reason, your eye brows fall out, or you detect excessive nose hair.

Possible side effects include, but are not limited to possible loss of all curly body hair, extreme fingernail and toenail growth, terminal runny nose, impacted ear wax leading to extemporal vertigo stupendous, regressive genderitis, allergy to underwear, loss of ability to tie shoes due to failure of opposing thumbs.

If you experience any of the indicated symptoms call your medical advisor as soon as they get back from vacation. While waiting, take aspirin.

Dumb? Yes.