Hearts & Softball

Posted on June 3, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

This morning at 0930 I had a nice chat with my cardiologist about the results of my echo-stress test. That happened on May 5th. I had an earlier appointment for today’s meeting but the doctor kindly rescheduled due to some sort of conflict, or emergent event. Because of all that I figured today’s appointment was a routine followup. It was that, and then some. However, it would appear that I have a bit of a problem. It’s one that can be fixed, but it was a surprise.

After the doc told me what a terrific job I did with the stress test, and that the echo cardiogram revealed that my heart is in pretty good shape, just a little calcium on the flappers. Nothing to be concerned about there, but he was concerned about the way the tests ended way back there on May 5th.

That brings me to the reasons why I had the tests in the first place.

Years ago I went to the doc to report an odd pain I got at the base of my jaw whenever I make one of my superhuman physical efforts at things like walking really, really fast, or when I get tingly things down my left arm when lifting heavy things. Really, this has been going on for years. Many of them. Ask Diane.

I’m not complaining, mind you, just reporting facts. Having those events actually helped me adopt a stress-free life which was good for me. I just decided that I wasn’t going to worry about anything no directly within my sphere of influence. I gotta tell you that it sure made life easy. Still does, actually.

Now, after today’s visit, I’m waiting for the doc’s office to call to tell me when I need to check in for my angiogram. Guess I have a blockage of some sorts and their going to find out what it is. Just don’t know when. I was told the chance that I’ll need bypass surgery is about 3% and that the solution would probably be one or more stents.

After that, Diane had a lot of time to wait for the St. Helens girls softball game against Rex Putnam. This was the game to find out who was going to play for first place. During our wait, we went to the movie and watch “Heaven is for real”.

It was another really defensive game, as expected. Over the course of 6 innings, Putnam scored 3 times to our 0. Then, all the sudden, it was St. Helens’ last at bat and they made it a very exciting one. They loaded the bases then got a hit that scored 2 leaving runners at 1st & second. Next hit was to shortstop who attempted to tag the runner on the way to 3rd, but lost the ball in the process. The runner continued toward home and was halfway there for the tying run when she stopped and returned to 3rd. We weren’t sure why. Next batter was out, game over. So, there will be no championship game this year for the Lady Lions, but they sure made it an interesting trip to this point. Next years should be a real hoot.

Now we’re home and it’s time for bed. Gotta golf tomorrow so need my rest.

70, Family, Friends, Music, & Tall Grass

Posted on May 21, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Today is my 70th birthday which means tomorrow I embark on my 8th decade of existence on planet Earth. I’m not yet sure how long I’ve really existed, however, because I have no empirical evidence that I did. Just “things” in my head that surely must be triggered by ancient memories about which I know nothing. Some I’ve shared. Some I can’t because I can’t format my limited words into a coherent statement well enough to describe some of the things I see when I close my eyes. Every time I do that I am treated to proof, to me, that thought is faster than a neutrino. As everyone knows, neutrinos were measured to travel faster than the speed of light, a speed that Einstein’s theory of relativity showed to be an absolute value. Nothing could travel faster. It was a speed limit of sorts. Now it’s been broken. But, the speed of thought can transport me millions of light years away in the blink of an eye.

Sorry about that. I kind of got sidetracked by a documentary I watched while checking this out.

Now, on to more important things like what I did today … first, however, I want to thank everyone who took the time to remember me today. I didn’t know I had so many friends, and family members older than me who could type. You all made me feel very special today. Thank you all!

Doug called me yesterday and suggested I join him and JP for another classic round of golf at the St. Helens Golf Course today at 0930. I said “yes” and told Diane who heartily agreed that I should go and enjoy the day. Besides, she’s working on the election counting board at the court-house today and probably won’t be home until some time Wednesday morning. So, I was released into the wild, free of supervision for an entire day.

At 0915 I headed for the golf course, arriving about 0925. It’s not very far away. Maybe 4 miles on back roads. We sat in the parking lot waiting for someone to arrive to give us a cart because we can’t make it around the course on foot like we used to. That person didn’t arrive until 1000, and the key to the golf cart barn wasn’t discovered until about 1030. By then the sun had risen that extra hour, causing us to be uncomfortably warm. Still, away we went.

It was fun, and we had a great visit. Since it was my birthday, I wasn’t allowed to spend money so my round, and share of the cart, were free for me. What a treat. Then we went to lunch at Fultano’s in Scappoose, something that’s verging on becoming a traditional stop after golf.

Before going to Scappoose, however, I had to back track to home and get some keys that I needed to deliver to the church. Coming in the back way, as I turned down N. Vernonia Road, I saw Diane heading down the street ahead of me as she had just pulled out from our street. I waved, but I’m sure she didn’t see me as I turned toward home.

Since Diane had just left the house, the dogs weren’t the least bit impressed that someone opened the garage door. They couldn’t have cared less, in fact. They didn’t make a peep. I gathered the keys I needed and headed off to church, dropped the keys, then went directly to Fultano’s where I found Doug and JP sitting outside, in the hot sun, waiting for me. I figured they would be inside, but they chose to make me feel really bad for the delay by sitting out there dripping sweat everywhere.

We had the meal and Doug made me feel worse, in a way, because he insisted on paying for my lunch. I didn’t think that was fair since he and JP had paid for golf, but apparently I wasn’t convincing enough and I didn’t want to get into a shouting match with my friends. So, I graciously accepted the gesture knowing that at some point in the future I’ll have a chance to reciprocate.

From lunch I went directly to the DMV to get my new driver’s license. I needed to do that so I can drive tomorrow because my old one expired today. That means, theoretically, if I went some place at 2359 this evening my license would expire at 0000 and I would no longer be able to drive. I’m not sure how that works, like if my arms would just freeze up causing me to miss a corner, or if the vehicle I was in would stop working. Not wanting to tempt fate, I thought it would be best to just get it done.

I walked into the DMV, took my number, and was immediately called to the counter. It was amazing! Normally I have to wait at least an hour or so to be called, but I got right in. The fact that I was the only customer in the place may have had something to do with that, but it was still a treat. Traditionally, the DMV is always crowded.

As soon as I got to the counter, and started laying out the paperwork necessary for my new license, and my new disabled pass, I realized I was missing a crucial piece of ID. My passport. Either that, or a birth certificate was necessary to prove I’m a real citizen and worthy of getting my license renewed. I was given a little stamped piece of paper and sent off to get the passport.

When I returned the parking lot was full and I knew I was doomed to a long wait. However, I learned the little piece of paper was a special front of the line pass and again was beckoned directly to the counter upon entering the office. Another treat for my birthday. Additionally, I was served by a fellow retired Chief Petty Officer named John, who just happens to be Diane’s cousin. That’s handy. We have things in common.

John checked my eyes to make sure they worked, took my picture without specs so the NSA’s facial recognition will be able to detect me if I’m ever kidnapped, or rob a bank, gave me my documents, and sent me on my way. It was about the best ever visit I’ve had to the DMV.

From there I went directly home where I checked the bag I found on the front porch during my previous visit because I didn’t have time to check it then. It contained two pints of grape jelly from our friend Jeannie E who made the jelly from the grapes she harvested from our vines. I’m looking forward to my next PB&J with a strange new desire because of this. Maybe I’ll have one for breakfast.

Yesterday I got a birthday card in the mail from Susan who lives in Connecticut. She’s my Sister-In-Law Ruth’s granddaughter so suspect she some sort of niece of mine. I figure that’s true because she, and her siblings, as well as Sarah, call me Uncle Jerrie. They call Diane Aunt Diane, too, just to reinforce my belief. I also got cards in the mail from PGE and my insurance company. I liked Susan’s the best. I got many other cards, too, but they weren’t delivered in the mail and I really liked them, too.

I sat down on in my recliner for about an hour waiting for Jennie, Cedric, Lydia, & Jeran to arrive with dinner. I was told to do nothing, so I didn’t. They arrived with spaghetti (my favorite), french bread (my favorite) and a tray of cucumber, carrot, and radish (my favorite) slices. We had a terrific dinner and had time to visit a bit before it was made known that they had also arrived with a festive bag for me.

In the bag were cards from the kids, and from Jennie. Both had buttons which I will wear with pride. I’ll take a picture when I do so you can see them. The children’s button says I’m the “#1 Grandpa”. Jennie’s reports that “My Daughter is #1”, which she truly is. I also got a crafty picture frame and a unique rendition of a family tree which Jennie started with her thumbprint in green for leaves. It came with red paint so all the grandchildren can add their thumbprints as fruit. Very cool and especially excellent because it’s home-made.

After the gifts were given, Jennie, Cedric, and Jeran left because Jeran had to be at the high school to participate in his final choral recital of the year. He had to be there by 1830 for the 1900 show. Lydia stayed with me because she had some home work to do and it wasn’t time for us to go yet.

Then Jeff, Heather, Gilligan, Baylee, and Jerrie showed up to round out the day of special events. The girls are such a joy and I love them very much. I love their Mom and Dad very much, too. I was given a tie-dyed T-shirt, that they helped create, proclaiming me to be a “The World’s Best Grandpa, Hands Down”. Then all three girls were given a color of paint which they used to apply their hand prints to the front of the shirt. Since Lydia was here, she got to add hers, too. I will get Cedric’s & Jeran’s the next time they are here. It’s very awesome.

After the visit Lydia and I headed for the high school for the recital. We were a bit late, and the parking lot was more than full, so I parked illegally in a loading zone. It was OK. I was next to someone else who had parked there first. There wasn’t going to be any loading during the recital.

We got inside just as the acapella choir was finishing their opening bit. It was dark, and we couldn’t see right away, so couldn’t find the seats that were being saved for us. Lydia’s eyes adjusted quickest and she led me in. Though I stepped on the toes of a few strangers, no one complained because they just didn’t care.

The recital is put on by choral groups from 7th through 12th grades so there are a lot of kids involved. Jeran is finishing up 8th grade this year so we hadn’t missed him as his class came on as the third group. All the kids were sitting in the front rows of the auditorium and when Jeran’s class stood up to go on stage he was immediately prominent as one of the tallest. They did awesome, as did all the other groups and grades. One advanced group performed a piece that lasted about 15 minutes. It was an incredible amount of words and melodies to remember but they did it perfectly.

For the finale, some of the kids went on stage to the risers, others lined the sides of the auditorium, and the remainder stood and faced the audience as they all sang an incredibly beautiful rendition of “Hallelujah“. Whenever I hear the song I get totally mesmerized by the melody and have never really listened to the lyrics. I have to admit that they don’t seem to fit with the beauty of the melody, but the combination, to me, is very beautiful to hear, especially in 4-part harmony by such a large group. Had I been the least bit aware, and used only a tiny bit of my little used brain,
I would have taken a video of the performance, but all I have is one photo.

Jeran is the tallest one, center, of the row facing the audience. He did a great job. All the kids did a great job and I loved all 2 hours of it.

Now, just for fun, here are some photos of the brownie cake Jennie made, that I didn’t mention …

Brownie Birthday Cakes are awesome!

The cake Nelda made for me last week …The 3-Jerry Group …

Tom swinging in the breeze …

… and a little chronological sequence of the grass battle at the church …

First is from May 10th when Howard jumped in to save me from having to flattened all this with a weed whacker …

Then I used the church mower to chop it down some more, and scatter the grass so it would dry …

… and raked it into piles to load into the truck. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but it was brutal.
The next effort will be to load and move the grass using a real pitchfork, then mow and vacuum before it has a chance to grow any more. I’m taking my mower out there to help with that.

OK. That’s all I got for this effort. It’s now 0105 on May 21st, I’m still alone with the dogs, and I’m going to bed.

Mornings, Golf, Dead Clams, Stumps, & Mowing

Posted on May 7, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

This morning Ozzie woke me up at 0530, a fairly certain indicator that we need blackout blinds for our bedroom. It’s getting light earlier and earlier and it’s pretty obvious that’s what gets him going. I learned a couple of days ago that Diane has been playing possum in the morning because Ozzie tries to wake her up first by walking up and down her body. She tuffs it out, however, knowing I’ll eventually get up and let him outside. Then she goes back to sleep for 3-4 hours. Tomorrow I’m going to try that and see what happens.

I slept on the couch until 0830, when Diane got up. She said Doug had called about golfing this morning so I went out and we teed off at 0945. I took Cedric’s Ping driver to see how well it worked, just for fun. I’ve never hit anything with a Ping club because I’ve never been in close proximity to one of them. Turns out it really does make a “ping” sound when you hit the ball just right. That’s not something I did with consistency, but I have to admit I did manage to whack a few tremendous drives. Straight, and everything. Very un-Jerrie-like.

After a fun, but bad round of golf with Junior and Doug, we went to Scappoose for lunch at Fultano’s Pizza joint. I knew Diane was going to be in Scappoose because she told me. That meant she would be at Goodwill, about 300 feet from Fultano’s so I couldn’t very well go to lunch there without alerting her. I’d planned to do that, anyway, but forgot my phone. So, I borrowed Junior’s to make the call. She agreed, of course. Who wouldn’t? We ate pizza and salad, and visited.

On the way home I stopped by Junior’s place to get some fresh dead clams so I could deliver them to Jack & Wynette. He’s always doing that because they really like dead clams. I was happy to do it for him because he was tired. Also, the story about how he got those clams was pretty exciting according to Doug. He told me that while hunting the tell-tale clam signs on the beach, Junior had to get closer to the ground. Too close, it turns out, because he was tumbled by a rogue wave. If he hadn’t been broadsided, the outcome may have been a little better, but he was. Doug said Junior rolled around in the water for a while, embarrassing him so he had to finally go get him and move him to higher ground. Doug said it wasn’t easy because Junior’s boots were full of water and he was hard to drag up the beach. But, he did it, and he salvaged the clams Junior had painstakingly gathered. That was the important part. So, sharing them with J & W has more meaning because Junior put his life at risk to capture some poor unassuming clams, trying to make a living in the sand. Now they will never see their babies again. If they had babies. Maybe they didn’t.

After visiting with J & W for a while I went home to dig out more stumps. It’s a grueling job, but it had to be done. So, I donned a new set of dirty clothes and went out to getter done.

The chore began in a normal manner but it was terribly tiring. Made me breath hard, like a pretty girl does, or going up the stairs. And I rid myself of a lot of excess sweat. Because of my tendency sweat at the sight of a pretty girl, I’m not allowed to watch any of those Victoria’s Secret commercials, or the Blazer dancers. Any dancers, actually. Especially those nearly naked ones on Dancing With The Stars. It’s a terrible affliction. Honest, it is.

When the sweat ran out, I had to find a better way to eliminate the stumps and decided to use the truck to pull them out. I found the towing strap in the garage, hooked it to the bumper hitch, wound it around a stump and wallah! Out it came, simple as could be, making me wonder why I didn’t think of that before. Such a simple solution, until the truck ran out of gas. I found a couple of gallons in a can in the garage, dumped it in the truck … and the battery was dead. It wouldn’t start. Being a believer in Karma, I took that as an obvious sign that it was time to quit.

So, I did. I quit, went out back and mowed the yard. That went fairly quickly because I didn’t bag it. I had to get it mowed because it’s going to rain tomorrow and I was prevented from mowing it completely because of events a few days ago. Don’t remember what events those were, but they kept me from mowing.

Once I was clean enough to enter the living room, we watched the new “24” show.

Jack’s back!

Safeway Deli Food, Panzee, Insurance, Silverado, Cardio, & Golf

Posted on March 12, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

It’s been four days since I’ve propped myself up at this keyboard and a lot has happened. That doesn’t mean this will be jammed packed with interesting information because the memory problem remains a factor. I do, however, have a calendar into which I’ve recently begun to add events so I can recall. Now all I need to do is figure out the code I used in the shorthand.

Let’s see … Sunday was normal. No change, there. We went to church, brought Mom home for lunch, and watch “stuff” on TV. We did change it up a bit for lunch by getting Chinese food from the Safeway deli on the way home. It’s pretty good stuff. Broccoli Beef, Orange Chicken, Fried Rice, Noodles, and Spring Rolls. Really, really good. That’s all I remember.

On Monday I had a 1000 appointment at Midway Vet for Panzee for some shot updates and an exam. It was all good, although we had to sit and wait until almost 1100 to be seen. That was OK because Panzee was the best looking dog in the place so we were just fine sitting there looking awesome. She’s a sweetheart and very well-mannered. In dog years she’s about 85 which may account for all of that. Doc said he thought she was between 5-7 years old in people years, but she’s really 12-13 and in terrific shape. Now, if she were only bald so she couldn’t shed.

Tuesday I met with Heather, my new insurance agent who runs American Family Insurance here in town. I switched from Allstate who has been our choice for 20-25 years. AmFam beats them hands down so I switched everything to them. It was a good choice. Heather already seems like a family member. Could be because she also insures Jennifer and family, and has been friends with Jeff for years. That, and she’s got the same last name as my barber, though they claim to not know each other.

After working with Heather, I stopped by Emmert Motors to look at Diane’s new pickup. It’s a 2014 Silverado 1500 High Country that was just put on the lot. All the right colors and bells & whistles. Yes, Diane’s been wanting a pickup for a long time but we’ve been fiddling around with these old Winnebagos for too long and have decided it’s time to be more reasonable and divest ourselves of those projects. That also applies to the old 1968 truck, if anyone’s interested. We are parring down in preparation for another leisurely trip around the USA. News at 11 on that.

From the pickup I made my presence known at the Legacy Health Clinic for my 1430 appointment with my new cardiologist. We had a great visit and he learned a lot about what makes me tick. As a result, he’s scheduling me for a stress test in conjunction with an echocardiogram. I get to watch my heart beat during the process which he said is “wicked cool.” I really like him and trust that if he manages to give me a heart attack during this process he can bring me back from the brink. It that does happen, I suspect I will be able to witness the event in living color. Don’t know when that will be, but I’ll be sure to report on it.

Later in the day on Tuesday, my good friend Doug dropped by to talk about some American Legion “stuff”, and to report that Wednesday, today, was going to be the nicest day of the year so we had to go play golf. He, JP, and Lyle were teeing off at 1000. Knowing we wouldn’t be able to finish a round in just two hours I had to beg off because I had a 1200 PT appointment for my shoulder. So, he made a command decision to move tee time back to 0900.

This morning, at 0730, Doug called to say Lyle couldn’t make it at 0900 so I agreed to just join them at 1000 and leave when I had to go for my PT. On the way to the golf course, I stopped by the PT place and inquired about changing my appointment due to conflicting engagements. Crystal and Terry were happy to oblige, so I was good to go.

It was an incredibly beautiful day. Clear, sunny and warm. Just perfect. I started off pretty good and finished the first hole in single digits. That’s a goal I don’t normally achieve. From there I kinda fiddled around, hitting the ball badly like I usually do, then something clicked and I started swinging slower and actually watched the ball throughout my entire swing. It’s amazing what happens when you do that. The ball actually went straight, and I started to look like a real golfer. I kinda felt like one, too. Turns out I was the only one in the group to par a hole, and I bogied 3-4 others. When the count was done Lyle and I tied at 52, JP had 53 and Doug had a 54. Very unusual because I never beat, or tie, those guys. This is for nine holes, by the way. We don’t do 18 like real golfers because it’s just too far. And, for us, low 50’s is good, especially for JP and me because we have 36 handicaps. We’re really that bad. But, we have a great time.

After the game we headed to Fultano’s in Scappoose for lunch. I called Diane to see if she wanted to join us, but she was having a good time pawing through ‘stuff’ at the senior center store in St. Helens and declined. Then I called Jack’s cell, which he didn’t answer, I was sure, because he was working. Then I called his house and got Wynette who confirmed that. So, I asked her out to lunch and she accepted.

Lunch was great and we had a good visit with all the Peal brothers, Jerry, JP, and Doug. Then I took Wynette home and went to work on Jack’s laptop. I was supposed to call him yesterday afternoon, but forgot. He called me while I was getting dressed after seeing the cardiologist and literally caught me with my pants down. I suppose I could have ignored the call, but didn’t, and asked if I could call back, which I didn’t do.

He had a unique problem which baffled me for the entire time I was there. He has a Verizon hot spot for his phone and internet because he’s too far away from any kind of reasonably priced cable installation. It works really well both at home, and on the road. I couldn’t, however, get his computer to connect to it. The little wireless light just wouldn’t turn the correct color, white, indicating connection and internet access. I tried everything I could think of and wasn’t having any luck at all.

Then, around 1630, Diane texted me asking if I’d run off into a ditch or something because I’d been gone for about 7 hours. It was a reasonable question, and I was amazed that so much time had passed by unnoticed as I fought with Jack’s laptop. Then, right as I answered Diane’s text, apologizing for not letting her know what I was doing, Jack’s laptop connected and everything appeared to work just like normal. It makes me wonder, a lot, if only Diane had texted me earlier, if the laptop would have worked then. It was like magic. I walked away without a clue about what made it finally work, except for Diane’s scathing text.

From there I went right to Church for our Lenten Service. Diane made her excellent vegetable soup.

Kathryn showed up with chicken noodle soup, and three guests … her son John, his fiancé Brittany, and her son Dominick. I sat next to John and, obeying my inquisitive nature, inquired about the musical note on his hand asking if he was a musician. “Percussion,” he said to which I replied that “I played the snare drum in my high school band.” Just one drum, not a set like he surely does. This conversation continued to reveal layers of substance. Then I mentioned the Trojan Swamp Monster band that our son Jeff is working with. Turns out John knows Jeff, Logan, and Shene, and visited our old house down by the river at some point in the past. I do not remember meeting him, but apparently we did.

Just one more “Small World” indicator for me. For Jeff, his name is John Wold. Remember?

Now it’s late and I must reattach my heart monitor and retire for the night.

I’ll leave you with an image that just never gets old. This is looking back up the 5th fairway with Mt. St. Helens gleaming bright. Life is good.

Justin Bieber, Golf, & Lunch

Posted on January 24, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Just a quick nod to JB, then I’ll get on to something worthy of discussion …

In my humble opinion this kid is an over rated human who needs to be deported back to Canada.

Let them deal with him.

Now for important “stuff” … Golf, and pretty much anything else than JB!

That’s what I did today with Doug, Junior, and Lyle. This Lyle is our local American Legion Commander and he’s commonly called “chief” because of his American Indian heritage. “Why,” you may ask, “does he allow people to call him that? I mean, think of the demeaning nature of being called ‘Chief’! How awful is that?” Well, bottom line is he’s perfectly OK with it. He’s responded to that name most of his life and he even writes that on his golf balls. Anyone who finds one knows the owner and returns it. Except for me. I keep them.

We all golfed pretty good, too. I even parred a hole, and had a couple of respectable bogeys. Nifty. Doug chipped in for a birdie on one hole and wound up beating me by 10 strokes. That’s not a difficult feat for him. I’ve discovered that I actually get better scores since I started counting all my strokes, as I go, instead of trying to remember after I’m done with a hole. what a difference.

Here’s a ‘selfie’ I took of the crew, left to right: Lyle, Junior, Doug, and me …

Here’s Junior teeing off on the third hole …

After finishing our game, we went to Fultano’s, in Scappoose, where Doug & Junior’s older brother, Jerry, and my older brother, Jack, joined us for a nutritious serving of salad for everyone but me. I also had pizza. Five pieces. And 1.5 large cokes. It was very filling.

Then I went home for a very brief time, then Diane and I returned to our church, Bethany Lutheran, where our plan was to make copies of the Annual Report we will need for Sunday. Sadly, I left the file I needed to copy at home. So we returned to get it. Then, back to church to deal with a copier always thinks it needs new parts, which it doesn’t, and it stops working when it gets too hot, which it did after only 17 of the 50 copies I was looking for. So, we packed up and went back home. Again.

I took the original file, scanned it to my computer to make a PDF file, then started printing the 33 copies we still needed. So far, as of this moment, I’ve done 15 of them. I would have had more, but while sitting here, watching TV, my printer over ran and spit three whole copies on the floor. They had to be collated, which took time because the paper covered about a 4 foot square area and didn’t really land in order.

On a lighter note, here’s Lydia in her Winter Ball uniform …

I find it interesting that she’s going to the Scappoose High School Winter Ball with a junior. I find that deplorable because when Diane was a freshman I was a senior. Lydia should have shot a little higher. But, her date, Wayne, is reportedly a good guy and he’s 6’3″ tall, able to provide ample protection should the need arise. He’s Cedric’s friend from church youth group. She will have a great time.

Still, she’s a St. Helens High School student who is going to the Scappoose High School winter ball. Diane and I find it sad that the old St. Helens vs. Scappoose rivalry isn’t like it used to be when we went to Scappoose High.

Now, I must quit, and make more copies.

Things With Engines and Golfing

Posted on January 16, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Now that I’m older, it’s becoming apparent that I have absolutely no business, at all, having more than a couple of pieces of equipment with internal combustion engines. There are multiple reasons for that revelation, but the most important one was issued by Diane. She told me we had too many of them and should divest ourselves of those not deemed essential.

When this was pointed out to me, I got to looking around, and was astounded by the reality of that observation. I never gave it any thought during the collection process and now I have eight (8) pieces of equipment that require attention to ensure they run when I want them too. This takes time and effort I don’t really want to expect right now because I have other important things to do, like finish the baseboards in the house.

Still, the engines call to me, and require attention to ensure they will start on demand. Sadly, they require more attention than I’ve been giving them and they’re getting older, like me, and require more attention. I suppose that’s like me, too, if you ask the right person. So, I’ve been working on these things with motors, except for the weed whacker and lawn mower, getting them running so the oil can be moved around a little.

To get the engines to turn over makes it necessary to ensure the batteries are fully charged. This is an ongoing effort because they reside in vehicles that don’t have their electrical circuits stimulated very often. Once charged, the effort to achieve ignition is limited only to the proper flow of gasoline. Within minutes, usually, the engine starts and I let it run for a while before turning it off to await the next time I find it necessary to fire it up. As of today, I’ve managed to start seven of them, and I’m confident the eighth won’t be a problem. It doesn’t get started very often because it doesn’t have a battery installed. I need to put one in place each time I want to turn it on. That will happen tomorrow. Maybe. Unless it rains.

Today, instead of doing real work all day, I went golfing with my friends Doug, and Junior. Prior to that, however, I had coffee with the MELCA group at the Kozy Korner. They do that every Thursday morning at 0900. In attendance were Ross, Larry, Larry, Everett, and Loren. We talked for an hour, drinking coffee non-stop, solving many of the worlds problems, then I had to excuse myself so I wouldn’t be more than 10 minutes late for my golf date with Doug and Junior. And Lyle, too.

As planned, I arrived at 1010 for our 1000 tee time. Doug and Junior rode in a cart while Lyle and I walked. It was a good day. We all golfed well. I even parred one of the holes, and I had the highest score, so I won. I had a 54 and the other three only had 53’s. Go figure that. That’s for nine holes, and the best I’ve ever done. Most of the time I’m over 60 which is important because it keeps my handicap nice and high.

After golfing we went to lunch at Burgerville. I had to do that because Diane told me to. She was going shopping and had already eaten her lunch. I had a Tillamook Cheesburger basket and it was awesome. I usually just get a simple Double Cheesburger but this time felt a need to ingest a slice of tomato and some limp lettuce.

I hope everyone had a good day. Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to report some major progress on the baseboard project.

I hope.

Insomnia and a Cold Church

Posted on January 5, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

Last night was brutal because I didn’t sleep. Hardly a wink at all. Instead, I drifted in and out of lucidity, thinking about unfinished projects and planning on how they will be completed. While laying awake, I finished almost all of them in my mind. We all have that ability, to pretend we get things done. I’m an expert at that. Making that fantasy reality is more difficult. But, it’s fun to hallucinate.

I really didn’t think I’d be able to function this morning because while golfing yesterday, on one particularly exciting effort hit the ball, I missed it. Since I was intending to hit ball really really hard, I wound up pretty tight. When I unwound, things went quickly and the torque loss my body expected, at the point of impact with the ball, was missed causing me to bend in ways I hadn’t anticipated. The result was a brief, terrible pain in my back that I thought was going to drop me to my knees, embarrassing me in front of my friends. I fought through it, though, and remained erect. The price for that, I anticipated, would be uncommon agony when I attempted to extract myself from bed this morning. Thankfully, I was able to arise easily which gave me confidence I would be able to navigate OK throughout the day.

So far, that’s been true. I made it through a very cold church service and a festive, post holiday lunch at Burgerville. Our church was cold because it’s really old and all of the heat goes quickly to the 30 foot ceiling, and stays there. We do have ceiling fans installed to circulate the warmth, but it takes a while to get enough warm air up there to move around. There are only two heat vents in church and both are at the front of the church. When they are closed, there’s no heat to circulate and the basement gets really toasty. The vents are remnants from the past when the church was built in 1908. Directly below the vents was originally a wood fired furnace contained in a small space. The heat circulated into the church via convection. When an oil furnace was installed, when oil furnaces were first invented I think, they were connected directly to the old convection vents, and an air return was added at the back of the church. So, the warm air would go up in the front, across the ceiling to the back of the church, and down to the air return. All the people between those two points remained the same temperature they were when entering. So it was today, even though we have three fans across the top, and a new gas furnace. It was cold. Everyone was cold because the vents were closed during Mabel’s funeral service. I just so happens the only place to place a casket is over the vents. So, they were closed and didn’t get reopened until this morning, shortly before church which isn’t nearly enough time for the heat to get all over. It needs at least 24 hours. Not economical, but it works. The hamburger warmed me up, as did the cup of coffee after service.

To ensure a successful conclusion to this day, I’m not going to do anything else except sit on the couch, eat popcorn & fudge, and watch TV, like normal. Well, not totally like normal because we don’t always have fudge. We could, but we don’t because I only make it at Christmas.

Winter Golf and BLTs

Posted on January 4, 2014 by Jerrie Cate

I regret not getting something posted yesterday. Because of that I’ve already failed in my unspoken goal of posting every day in 2014. Therefore, I can pretty much relax the rest of the year because my other goal, of not gaining 125 pounds this year, is a relatively safe one. I may, however, make it up by posting multiple times one of these days.

Though I’m sure everyone finds that bit of information incredibly interesting, I must move on to more important issues. One of those is the weather.

The Mid West and East Coast are getting pummeled with terribly cold storms due, no doubt, to global warming. It has to be that. In stark contrast, we here in normally rainy Oregon are the recipients of some unseasonably beautiful days. Even the flowers think it’s time to rise and shine. Daffodils are popping up all over the place. Then, today, just because we could, Doug, Junior, and I went golfing. The 4th of January in Oregon and we went golfing!

Sure, there was frost everywhere, and the roads were very slick on the sections that hadn’t yet seen the sun, and the greens were cement hard, but it was a good day. I had my best round of the year. It wasn’t a particularly good one, but it was my best one so far and guaranteed to ensure my handicap remains one of the highest allowed. Here’s what we had to contend with …

The vest stayed on during the entire game. So did the driving gloves I decided to wear. They worked better than the golf glove I usually wear, when I remember.

This was interesting … it’s a line of frost going directly away from the hole which was in the shadow of the pin. Pretty cool.

Here’s Doug contemplating whether to get his putter or just finish out the hole with his 5 iron.

It’s just too nice for words …

Like normal, Doug and Junior got to the course before me and already had a cart. Normally, they would get one for me, too, and we’d split the cost for both three ways. This time, however, they didn’t do that. They told me they thought I preferred to walk, which I did the last couple of times because I need the exercise. So, they made me walk the entire course, in the cold, knowing my feet were getting all wet as the frost melted. Oh, they tried to get me to ride with them, by standing on the funning board and holding on to the little golf cart chicken bar, but I declined. Doug did his best to make me feel bad about it by driving slowly along side of me as I struggled from hole to hole, but I didn’t let him get to me. I toughed it out. I might not be able to walk tomorrow, but I did it.

After we finished with golf, we made up and were tentatively going to Sunshine Pizza for lunch. I got permission from them to invite Diane, but she replied that she had made BLTs for us. By “us”, I mean Diane and me. That was a lunch date breaker. I love BLTs so I went home. On the way I stopped at cousin Don’s house to wish him a Happy New Year, and had the added pleasure of greeting Herb and Christy, too. Herb is Don’s best friend who lives just across the street. Christy drives car #44 at the track. All these folks are gear heads and I’m just a wannabe one of those.

I got home and Diane constructed my sandwich. I gotta tell you, this is the BLT of all BLTs. Even though I chipped one of my front teeth on it, it was awesome.

Now we’re kicked back on the couch watching the Philadelphia Eagles play the New Orleans Saints in a wild card bid for the NFL playoffs. We’re rooting for the Eagles because their coach is Chip Kelly who is the ex-Duck coach. He’s finishing his first year as a pro coach and is doing pretty good.

Now it’s time to stop, but I have to share my favorite quote from one of the movies being advertised on TV. I don’t know what the name is, but it has a guy who said, “lick me all over till I shine like a trout.”

I already know I’m going to love that movie.

Golf, Food, and Computers

Posted on November 25, 2013 by Jerrie Cate

Today I only did three things of significance, other than waking up to celebrate one more day on the green side of the grass.

I’ve been doing pretty well getting through the last 3-4 days without my morning nap. It’s been tough, but in that regard I’m a trooper. I guess. I don’t know how long that’s going to last, however, because my body is craving that nap. It’s becoming important. But, I have to admit that I see to get more things accomplished when I stay off the recliner in the morning.

Yesterday JP called me suggesting we play golf today and Diane was all for that. I think she likes me doing things like that because it’s good for me to socialize once in a while, and she likes puttering around without me getting in the way.

So, shortly before 1000 I headed for the golf course. JP and Doug were already there, like normal. They almost always get there first which makes it good for me because I don’t have to stand around and wait for them to show up. That was good this morning because it was cold, like 26 degrees cold. A great day for golf, right? Chilly, yes, but incredibly beautiful. Here’s JP shooting his second shot from the ‘ditch’ on the first hole. That white stuff is frost, not snow. What fun.

My tee shot wound up on the top of the hill, a place where I normally don’t land. It was by far my best shot of the day. So, it started well. Even though I play badly, as a rule, I still have a great deal of fun. We all do because we’re not all that serious about it. Well, maybe Doug is a little serious about it most times, but today he found it a little difficult to do that. In an uncharacteristic display of really bad golf, he hit his golf cart twice. I suppose that, in itself, isn’t all that extraordinary, except for the fact that the cart was parked directly in front of him, as he addressed his ball for a fairway shot both times. I mean, it was right there in front of him, like a challenge he could not refuse. Hitting the cart means it had to hit the ball right off the tip of his club to make it go exactly 90 degrees from the directly he was aiming. Quite remarkable to do it once. Twice, in one game, is probably a course record. I’ll have to check and let you know. If I don’t get back on that it’s because Doug convinced me it probably wasn’t a good idea.

Here’s Doug waiting to tee off on hole 6 after setting that course record on hole 5.

Here’s another shot from the tee on #9.

After golfing poorly, I was asked to go to lunch with them. I called Diane and got permission to do that so followed JP to Longfellow’s in Scappoose. Longfellow’s has been in the same location for as long as I can remember things that happened a long time ago. Really, it’s been there my entire life. They have a grill in the middle of the cafe part on which they grill all the meat ordered by patrons.

When we entered the facility from the incredibly bright sunshine, I couldn’t see a darn thing. My glasses were dark, for one, and the lights were very dim, for another, combining to make it very difficult to find the restroom, for which I had a great need.

So, I just stood there, waiting to regain my vision. Finally, I saw Jerry, older brother of JP and Doug, sitting at a table toward the back of the room. I made my way there and asked directions to the room with a urinal. He pointed me in the proper direction, through the bar area, warning me about the step up. The bar area is one step up from all directions, a handy feature that ensures patrons of that area cannot easily navigate safely into the cafe area because they always fall down. Sadly, as I said, there is a step up from all directions meaning I had to step down into the restroom area.

Having safely made the trip, I captured the chair next to Jerry. JP and Doug sat across from us then out of nowhere appeared Mike, one of our old high school teachers. Mike is only a few years older than us, so it’s OK. We’re all friends now, instead of teacher/student where friendship is not an option. JP had a patty melt on sourdough, Doug had a hamburger, Jerry had the salad bar, and I had the chili dog special. Mike didn’t eat anything.

The burger patties for the two sandwiches were absolutely huge – 1/2 lb of pure, unadulterated dead steer. It really looked good and temporarily made me sorry I hadn’t ordered one of them. But, the dog was very good. Jerry’s salad looked good, too.

Once the meal was over I went back to Jerry’s house for phase two on Dolores’s computer. As you may recall, I spent 4 hours on it last Thursday, but didn’t finish what I started. So, I had some work to do. Now, I’m not a whiz kid with computers, but I can fake my way through some pretty tense situations. Another thing I (think I) can do OK is show others how to do the same. Dolores is a good student because she’s not afraid to push buttons to see what happens. Jerry, on the other hand, is a bit hesitant to push buttons. He did it, but I could tell it was a struggle. Bottom line, he pushed through like a good soldier and got it done.

I texted Diane to let her know where I was so I wouldn’t be in trouble by not showing up right after lunch. She was OK with that because she was heading out to get more yogurt, and other stuff. We haven’t had yogurt in a few days and I was going into withdrawal. It’s not pretty. I was missing “other stuff”, too.

Now it’s time to quit.

Diane’s Hair, Fire, Golf, Mechanical Stuff, and Food

Posted on September 28, 2013 by Jerrie Cate

First, here’s Diane’s new hairdo for those of you who requested it. It’s kinda like the picture I took in Hawaii and included with the tiki torch entry. I like it. I tell her that, but I’m not sure she believes me. What do you think?

Now, about Jerrie the arsonist, the golfer, the mechanic, and elctronical wizard – what a package!

On Thursday, the burn pile was reduced to a pretty flat mess of ashes. That would be the grey matter in the middle of the picture. The raised areas around it are grass clippings, which we are not allowed to burn. Before igniting the pile, it was tall enough, from this angle, to hide the clippings pile, and it was that tall all the way across. I stood out there for four hours monitoring the progress, moving things around, getting burnt here and there, and inhaled more than my share of smoke. It burned my eyes and my nose, but I hung in there and did my job. The neighbors, to the left, lit their burn pile, also, but our pile went away first.

Now, about golfing – Junior, Doug, and I are 1962 graduate of Scappoose Union High School. We weren’t the only three, of course, but we three see each other more often than the other 70+ remaining members of that class. That officially makes us old since we are well beyond the 50 mark, the point where many young people think we should be put out to pasture, so to speak, and we take that literally because we golf in St. Helens on a course that Jimbo would agree would be better served as a pasture. There are mole hills to contend with, and lost balls in the fairway because of deep grass, or simply deep mud, but it works for us. We have fun. Jimbo, by the way, is also a ’62 graduate, but he lives all the way over in Lake Oswego so we don’t get to see him very often.

Doug is the better golfer of the three of us, but Junior can whip him once in a while. I never do that. I’m just out there to whack a ball, and have a nice conversation while looking for it. We almost always find it, but not always. It doesn’t matter because pretty much all the balls I use were donated by golfers who went before me and we seem to usually come out ahead

Junior watches the golf channel all the time and is just full of little tidbits about how to golf better. Just enough to screw up anyone he’s golfing with, me especially. I don’t mind, because I’m not all that serious about golfing. For me, a round of golf is just a nice walk in the woods. Really. If there’s a tree around, I’ll wind up behind it. Because of that, I’ve adopted the attitude that I can hit my ball over, or through, any tree that’s in my way. Sometimes it works.

Here’s a picture of Junior, from yesterday, hitting his ball again from the same spot because he hit the sign you see a little ways in front of him. The sign was in his way and he made an impressive dent in the metal sign at the bottom right corner. You can actually see how it’s bent from the way it sits. We reviewed our rule book and determined that the sign was at fault, so retrieved his ricocheted ball from the middle of the fairway, put it in its original spot, and moved the sign to the right side of the cart path, away from Junior’s projected flight path.. The second effort was much better and I think we agreed that he parred the hole. Our rule book is better than the one other golfers use.

After I got home I decided to make myself a sandwich before Diane texted me about it. It’s always good when I can beat her to the punch once in a while. The choice for the sandwich was ham and cheese. Not wanting to open a brand new loaf of cheese, I chose to alter the configuration of the little left over cheese chunks, that we cut up for coffee hour last Sunday, by slicing them a little thinner. This is the good Tillamook cheddar cheese which I prefer to the Kraft peel-n-stick American Cheese Food that’s actually pretty good in a grilled cheese scenario.

Here’s a photographic progression of how I made that sandwich …

decided to tackle the broken RV so I could get it back into the driveway. This entailed removing the broken mechanical fuel pump to see if it was at least close to the one that came with the ’73. It was a minor miracle that it was, indeed, exactly like the one I needed. Funny, though, because it isn’t the right kind for the ’73. Funny how things work.

Once it was installed, I removed the electric fuel pump, which I determined just wasn’t cutting it, and was blessed with ignition. From this exercise, it’s readily evident that mechanical fuel pumps suck more than electric ones. It sucks better than the electric one I had, anyway. So, the RV is back in the driveway where it belongs. It’s still not leaking, either, though there were torrential downpours off and on all day yesterday.

Since the motor home was handled more quickly than I had anticipated, we decided to drive to Hillsboro to visit Best Buy and retrieve my new iPad which they reported had been received. I had an appointment with one of their Geeks at 1700 to make the switch. We went directly home from there, arriving shortly before the rains came. Rick and Jodi, and Tom and Linda will probably object to the fact that we were that close and didn’t stop and say Hi. Little do they know that when we visit Hillsboro, we drive by their houses at least twice, to see if anyone is looking. If no one charges out of the house on the second trip, we presume no one is there, and continue on our way. Yes, we could call, but choose to use the visual method of contact which is a bit more of a challenge.

That’s a lie. We don’t do drive bys. We should have called. Forgive us.

The new iPad proved to be an electronical challenge. That was mostly because of the Apple ID’s that are necessary to do back ups and restores. So, the back up I thought I had locked down, just kinda disappeared on me so I set the pad up as a new one instead. That means I had to remember all kinds of passwords and things that will make it work like it’s supposed to. Right now it’s wi-fi only which saves a buck or nine on fees, and I think I’m going to leave it that way.

For supper Diane made a terrific meal of re-purposed chicken parts that were formed into cute little sticks then covered with a lot of breading. Baked in the oven, from a frozen state, they do the job of filling the void and they are simple to fix. She also fixed frozen mac and cheese that didn’t turn out so well. I ate all of mine because I love my wife. I also got two ears of corn on the cob, cooked a few days ago, and reheated in the micro. Tasted just as good as if they were fresh. Here’s that meal …

Yes – both plates are mine. I admit it, I’m a pig.

Today I finished the church newsletter and Diane and I went out and cleaned the church up a bit. Mainly, I scrubbed up all the wine stains around the altar where people seem to have a little problem getting those tiny little cups up to their mouths. I may be guilty, too, but don’t have any memory of dripping wine on the carpet. What makes it more interesting is that the red wine stains are on a red carpet. You’d think the spots would just disappear, wouldn’t you? Doesn’t happen.

Now it’s getting on to dusk and I need to consider packing a suit case. Diane’s already done. She packed our coffee grinder in with her underwear. I told her I’d wrap it up in my skivvies, but she declined. I actually didn’t offer to do that, and I don’t know if it’s with her underwear. I’m just guessing.

Now I’m gonna quit and finish watching today’s football game. While doing this I watched the Oregon State Beavers decimate Colorado 44-11. In a little while I get to watch the Oregon Ducks play the Cal State Bears, I think. It will be interesting to see if Oregon continues it’s march to #1. this will be the Pac-12 opener for both teams.