Category Archives: Science

Weight Loss Furniture

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I heard on the news tonight (KGW Channel 8) that flame retardant chemicals on furniture are suspected to be linked to cancer, low IQ, and obesity in children.

Fortunately, I’m frequently told I’m childish and we just bought a new couch from Ashley Furniture that doesn’t have chemical flame retardants. Therefore, it stands to reason that I can sit on that couch as long as I want with no fear of gaining weight, getting cancer, or dropping a few numbers off my IQ. Also, since there was no mention of food regarding the obesity with regard to chemical flame retardants, I see no reason why I can’t eat whatever I want while sitting on that couch for as long as I want.

Life is good.

ISS, Reunions, Soccer, & Relative

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Have any of you folks in the Great Northwestern portion of this here United States looked at the evening sky lately to see the International Space Station flying by? Three days ago we were gazing up, watching the stars pop out, when the ISS went zooming overhead and watched for the entire five minutes it took to transit from one horizon to the other. Initial speculation that it was the space station was confirmed, by me, when I jumped on my smart phone, figuratively speaking, and searched for information about this event. What I found on the APP Store (for my iPhone) was “ISS Spotter”, a pretty handy application that plots the station’s progress around the world and provides a list of times when it will be visible, if clouds permit, over your location. Because of this we’ve been able to see if the last three evenings at the times indicated. Pretty cool. It was especially great last night because big brother Jim, and his bride Donna, as well as our other brother Jack, and his bride Wynette, were visiting and we all stood at our deck railing watching together as this wonder of science whizzed by overhead. It was a special moment.

The occasion of Jim and Donna’s visit was so they could attend the All School Reunion for Scappoose High School, an event that happens every five years. For a small town it’s quite an event and brings folks back from all over the place. For my bride, Diane, it was even more special because her class celebrated their 50th reunion in conjunction with the five-year event.

As a result of all these festivities I’ve managed to regain the 12 pounds I recently shed, by studiously eating reasonable portions at reasonable times. During the past week there was no schedule for meals and it’s hard to say No when there’s an opportunity to share a meal for family we don’t often see. Especially when they’re buying. Now I must climb back on the wagon and pay attention before the doctor tells me I must start injecting myself with insulin every 3-4 hours. I’ll let you know how that goes.

Jim and Donna arrived last Wednesday afternoon and it’s been pretty much non-stop until this morning when they departed on their way back home to somewhere in Idaho. We visit them once in a while when they grant us permission to cross the border. That doesn’t always happen and it’s getting more difficult to get a visa for such visits because of all the shootings around the country. Coming in to Oregon isn’t a problem because we don’t have any border restrictions, yet.

At this point of my narrative there will be a rather long pause as I depart our premises to transport Lydia & Morgan to goalie training in Hillsboro at this undogly hour of 0745. I don’t normally doe things like that this early in the morning, but Diane is going the other way, to Longview, shortly thereafter to get Jeran to his dentist appointment. She can drive fast, for sure, but not fast enough to be in two places 60 miles apart at the same time. So, I get to take the east-bound leg, something I don’t really mind doing at all.

Now for the pause —————————-0719 to 1350 – elapsed time 6hrs 31min

What a morning. Picked Lydia up and had to skip Morgan because she wasn’t feeling well and stayed home. So, we arrived about 20 minutes early and Lydia was the only one there for a long time. I pointed out to Lydia that some of them didn’t show up until 0930 and she said “that was the twins (girls). Their dad is an actor and they’re filming “The Librarians” in the area so they are spending the summer here. Interesting.

 Lydia got a 3-hour workout on very little food and she did great. The group was composed of both goalies and what I call “shooters” so Lydia and the other goalies got a good workout from some kids that can really handle a soccer ball. Made me tired so I put the top down on the PT, parked in the shade, and took a nap.

One of my classmates shared a joke with me that I feel compelled to pass along. I must warn you that, though it doesn’t contain vulgar language, the subject matter is a bit racy. If that concerns you, please stop now …

The joke … two ladies had lunch together at one of their village’s nicer establishments and the topic of their conversation swayed a bit to the exciting side of their lives. This happened when one of them noticed a gentleman across the room having lunch.

“See that fellow over by the door? I had a date with him a few days ago and he was a perfect gentleman the entire evening. He opened doors for me, took my jacket, helped with my chair, stood when I left the table … it was very refreshing to be treated like a lady. I was so comfortable with him that it didn’t occur to me to say “No” when he asked me to his home for a nightcap. Once we got in his house everything changed and he became an animal, pushing me around the house and ripping my clothes off like a wild man!”

Her friend, hand to mouth, exclaimed, “so, you’re telling me I should date him?”

“No,” said the lady, “just wear old clothes.”

To end I’ll share some photos from the part of the weekend I remember. First is Diane’s class of 1965.

IMG_2103 Here are what I understand are the main trouble makers of the class. A fun group.IMG_2128And, here’s a selfie of the Cate boys …IMG_2134

I’m A Weeble? Really?

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This morning Diane called me a Weeble when she warned the dog to look out because I was wobbling around a bit in order to position myself to give Panzee a belly rub with my foot. Yes, I wobble, which is not a surprise to many people, just to those who fleetingly viewed me as a solid, stand up citizen. No, I’m not one of those. I’m a citizen, true, and I stand up for our flag, but I’m far from solid.

I sway in a gentle breeze, turning to the left, mostly, but also to the right, if the wind is right, causing Diane less and less concern as she gets used to my new abilities related to vertical acuity, and not embarrassing her by falling in public. I’ve only done that once, but cannot remember the occasion because it was insignificant. A mere blip on my radar that went mostly unnoticed be everyone except the girl who screamed.

Calling me a Weeble makes me wonder if there is more to the name than a quick look could ascertain. Everyone knows what a Weeble is, right? You know, “Weebles Wobble But They Don’t Fall Down”? Remember that? Everyone had to have them because they were so cute, and they couldn’t be knocked over.

However, after being compared to one this morning, the name has been circling in my head wondering if there is an underlying meaning to her comparison. Just a moment ago I realized that she’s making a reference to my less than adequate sized testicles. What she’s really saying is wee balls. That’s got to be it. I’ll confront her in a couple of weeks about her underhanded name calling, if I remember. Or, perhaps within a few moments of her reading this, as I know she will.

In my youth, I was able to walk straight down that thin, well-defined line of decorum, never causing anyone on either side grief, or dismay about what I said or did. With Diane’s back-handed reference comparing me to a Weeble one might think, on the surface, that she’s concerned about me straddling the line, more than walking it, due to the increasing wobble in my gait as age overtakes me, and my brain isn’t quick enough to interpret my balance correctly causing it to over correct. It’s like the cruise control in Diane’s Buick that works just fine until a hill appears, then the vehicle slows down from 55 to 50, then shifts and speeds up to 60+ before settling back down to 55 just before the hill is crested. Doing that causes problems for everyone on both sides of the line defined specifically for me, for my passage through this life.

No, it’s not about that at all. It’s all about the size of one’s testicles. I’m sure.

That’s all I got for now. Later we’re going to Portland to have lunch with some southern relatives, Diane’s side, from Arizona – Julie, Duncan, and Jake. We’ll also get to see Bill, Carolyn, Terri, and Lisa. We’re eating Italian at Nona Whats-its-place in Beaverton.

Now I’m going to stop, get a mirror, and contemplate my Weebles.

Thin Set, Fast Food, Soccer, Cheese, and Quantum Physics

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The tiling in The Bathroom is done – Tomorrow we grout! Friday we seal, and Saturday the kids can start using the shower. It’s been a long 3-4 months for them and they’re all getting a little ripe. Personally, I’ll be the happiest camper when it’s all done because this project is consuming me. It makes me sweat profusely … that’s not valid for this task because everything makes me sweat profusely. It’s a gift.

The Bathroom was the only place I did anything constructive today. It was just me and Daniel, slapping tiles on the walls until it just felt “right”. Once the grout is applied most of the screw ups will disappear. They’re supposed to, anyway. We’ll see how that works out tomorrow when we apply that grout.

Before starting our work this morning, I had to go straighten up the Lion’s Club newspaper collection container. It’s huge, and people use it for disposing of all kinds of things. I asked Lydia if she wanted to go with me, since she likes to do all kinds of different things. Her only response was to ask if she went, “would I get her something to eat?” How could I refuse an offer like that?

Inside the container was the normal amount of ‘stuff’, including cardboard, a nicely taped up container of used cat litter, and a remarkable array of cereal containers. None of these items qualify as newspapers so they are pulled out of the mix, and then we stack papers. We build barriers about every two deposit slots, of which there are about 10, or 8, and keep stacking on the barrier, and throwing loose papers behind it, until it’s about nipple high. It was about halfway between belly button and nipple, on me, but Lydia thought it would be fun to get on the pile behind the barrier. I told her she had no idea where those papers had come from, or what had touched them, but that didn’t seem to faze her normally very persnickity health standards. She was going to do it anyway, so I said, “sure.” She made a move to leap over the barrier but stopped shortly after raising her leg about 2 feet off the floor, deciding it wasn’t such a good idea after all. This was caused, of course, by her newly acquired interest in soccer about which she is deadly serious. She’s signed up to play her freshman year at St. Helens High School and has been training pretty much every day all summer long. Her coaches have her running about 4+ miles a day, and weight training, in addition to actually playing soccer once in a while. She’s loving it, but her body is just getting used to the abuse, and it’s a little bit sore in spots. That’s why she’s hungry all the time, too. It’s amazing what she can consume. This morning I got her dead chicken tenders from Burgerville. For all of you non-Northwest folks, Burgerville is a local version of Burger King, but better. Really. It is. But, you know? It’s all just a matter of taste. A hamburger is a hamburger, no matter which way you cut it, but only Burgerville has a Tillamook Cheese Burger. They are the best. Tillamook Cheese is another kinda local product. Wisconsin doesn’t have anything on Oregon with regard to cheese lovers.

OK – that was uncalled for. I apologize to everyone who lives in Wisconsin, is from Wisconsin, or who might happen to be planning a trip to Wisconsin.

For our mandatory lunch, Daniel and I went to the drive thru at Muchas Gracias and each had a breakfast burrito. They are entire meals in a wrapper you can eat. How handy is that? That’s another food chain local to the area, in case you’re wondering. I would have gone thru any of the driver thrus, but Daniel chose Muchas. The drive thru was mandatory because we both smelled like well used mules after slaving away in the hot bathroom all morning.

Considering all of this activity around soccer, I guess I’m going to have to learn the rules for that game after all. I actually thought it would never happen. It’s just odd to me to be so involved in a sport that can end in a 0-0 tie and it’s deemed to be a good day. But, she’s really involved and we will be watching.

I just saw on the news that an 11-year-old boy has been admitted to Texas Christian University, home of the Horned Frogs, to study quantum physics. I’m stunned! I thought quantum mechanics was about the essence of, well, of everything. Maybe that’s why this youngster is also taking a course in religion. Hmmm. Wonder if he’s on to something. I might just have to form more theories and maybe he can solve them. Maybe he can solve the theories I already have. I wonder if he will talk with me. I wonder if I can remember all my theories. Dang! I might just have to let this kid run on his own.

Diane spent all most of the day getting her hair cut, and making potato salad for Community Meals at First Lutheran Church in St. Helens. I’ve talked about that before – it’s something they do every Tuesday and Thursday, just for fun, to feed anyone who wants a hot meal. It’s a great program. Diane always helps. I help when she asks me to. I quit volunteering when I joined the Navy, but I do what I’m told.

I think I’ve used up my quota of links for today so I’m going to bed and dream about grouting. That, and it’s time to get Diane away from her computer because she’s laughing out loud at funny animal things she’s finding on her computer.

No, I’ll just leave her alone. I love hearing her laugh.