Cedric’s a Sailor, County Fair, Camping, and Golf

Posted on July 25, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

Well, we made it safely back from our latest camping trip and I have a few minutes available to catch up on all our activities. I would have done a daily ‘thing’ but we (AT&T) did not have cell service and there was no internet. We didn’t have satellite TV, either. We really roughed it this time. Those who use Verizon and Sprint were still able to communicate which made me briefly consider switching carriers. Then Diane drove toward Vernonia, to the Forest Ranger Station, to call her Mom, Jean. During that process one of the Rangers came out and told her if she had Verizon she was out of luck because there was no service. But, AT&T worked. So, we’ll be sticking with AT&T for a while.

Before all the camping fun began we bid farewell to Cedric on the 19th as he began his trip to Navy boot camp at Great Lakes Recruit Training Center, just north of Chicago. He is a third generation Sailor in our family. Graduation is September 17th, I think, and there are plans in the works to attend the ceremony. I’m not sure, yet, if Diane and I will attend because Cedric is only allowed 4 guests. I think we plan to leave that special event for the immediate family because Diane and I have non-refundable plane tickets to Connecticut on September 20th. Two airplane rides that close together isn’t financially feasible, so we’ll rely on family photos and participate vicariously through them. We’ll see him when he comes home on leave.

Duly sworn in and officially a member of the Navy. Proud Mom, Dad, and Sister.

After wishing Cedric a safe journey, we all went home. That afternoon we went to the movie and watched “The Secret Life of Pets” at the Columbia Theater in St. Helens with Bob, Steff, and Jewel. Then we had dinner at Dockside. All of us were stuffed to the gills. By the time we got home it was time for bed.

The first day of the Columbia County Fair weekend was Wednesday, the 20th. That’s the day old people get in for free so we almost always go. There were fairs in past years where we helped and earned badges for daily entrance, but those days are behind us now. We took Gilligan, Baylee, and Jerrie with us, using ride wrist bands and entry tickets that Diane bought ahead of time. She also got wrist bands for Lydia and Jeran so it worked well that the 3 little ones were chaperoned by the two larger ones. It as pretty amazing that the children chose to go see all the animals before giving in to the allure of the carnival rides. Toward the end of the day, Jeff & Heather arrived and took charge of G, B, and J then we went plant shopping. Everyone had a great time. Even the old people.

Gilligan, Jerrie, and Baylee on the way in

Lydia, Jerrie, Gilligan, and Baylee confront a T-Rex.

Lydia conquers the wall … multiple times.

Jewel and Diane with their trusty dogs.

Bob finally has Steff where he wants her.

On Thursday, the 21st, we finalized our preparations for our Camping trip at Big Eddy. For those of you not familiar with the area, Big Eddy is a county park situated on the Nehalem River that flows through Vernonia. The river begins it’s journey on the east side of the Coast Range then loops around the north end of the range near the mouth of the Columbia River. Then it winds it’s way SW, finishing it’s 119 mile journey at Nehalem Bay, which is near Nehalem, OR. The bay feeds into the Pacific Ocean.

Diane and I fiddled around long enough to be the last ones out of the chute, consequently arriving last, which was OK. We arrived without incident, got parked and connected with lots of help from those who were already there. Then we started relaxing right away. That means we huddled around the camp fire all day and well into the evening, eating when food was ready, then going to bed when it was pitch black outside. Since the park is booked exclusively for the St. Helens Grace Baptist Church kids could run free, which they did, with no fear of danger, unless they fell down, which some did. It was chilly for the first couple of days so most of the time was spent around a fire, sharing stories and eating.

Here’s the night fire …

… and the day fire …

On Saturday the 23rd Bob, Steff, Jennifer, Diane, and I made the 7 mile trip to Vernonia to see what the Vernonia Saturday Market was about. Since nothing else was going on in town, there were only 4 booths open but they all had beautiful quality products. It was good to visit the town. The most interesting part of the visit was learning about David’s story. David is the first person we encountered in a little knickknacks shop on a corner. He was extremely nice, and friendly, and pointed us to his boss’s store a couple blocks up the street. At that store Donna, the owner, told the girls about David and what a remarkable life he had survived. He has Aspergers Syndrome and spent the first 55 years of his life hidden away from contact with anyone but his Mom or Dad. They didn’t know how to deal with him so tucked him away when folks visited. He never went to the doctor, dentist, or school. When his Dad died 7 years ago, his sister took him in and spent the next 5 years cleaning him up and exposing him to social situations until he was comfortable leaving his home. Donna met David when he and his sister visited her store and was impressed with David’s willingness to help. This led to a friendship that caused Donna to purchase another store which David manages. It’s his store. He’s 62 now and doing very well considering how much he missed during those 55 years of isolation. His store is on the corner of Adams Ave. and Bridge Street. Stop in and say HI, then go to Donna’s store and thank her for her incredible benevolent spirit.

After attending outdoor Sunday service, everyone packed up to go home. Bob & Steff were heading to Pendleton where they stayed at the Wild Horse Casino. On the way they were trapped in huge traffic jam caused by accident. It took them many hours longer than anticipated to reach their destination, but they eventually made it. We made it home without incident since we didn’t have to travel any of the freeways. The dogs were extremely happy to see us and Ziva let us know that it was a dirty trick to leave her behind when we know how much she enjoys camping. So, she will be going with us on all future trips.

This morning I went golfing with Doug and JP. It was a beautiful morning and we all did really well. I had three pars, a new personal best for me. Doug chipped in from 60 feet for a birdie which was fun to watch. It was a good day. When we finished we went to lunch, like we always do. I called Diane to see if she would like to join us, but she declined because she thought we were going to Burgerville, our normal choice. But, this time we went to the Village Inn where I had a very good Chicken Fried Steak, hash browns, and eggs. It was very good and I ate it all. Diane was upset about not going when she found out we didn’t go to Burgerville. It was very good and she missed out.

On the way home I stopped at O’Reilly’s for new spark plug wires for the truck because one wire burned out against the exhaust manifold making the truck sound a lot like a John Deere tractor. I also filled the truck with gas and got a container of gas for the lawn mower thinking I’d get something done outside. But, when Diane and Jewel left to go play around in thrift stores, I was told “No working outside because it’s 90 degrees!” I can only assume the she wasn’t in the mood to go looking for me after dying from heat exhaustion, and laying in the hot sun for hours. That probably wouldn’t be any fun at all, so I’m just staying inside, as directed.

That’s it. Except for this hydrangea that grows by our home.

We haven’t figured out what causes it to come out in multiple colors like this, but it’s kinda neat.

Hope The 4th Was With You, and Toilets

Posted on July 5, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

It is my sincere hope that all of you who celebrate the 4th of July with fireworks wound up with the correct number of fingers, toes, eyes, and ears this morning. There are many who dwell among us whose common sense, when lighting explosive things, fails them due to the influence of alcohol or other drugs of choice. When they wake up missing digits they will lament their decisions, just like all of those who served as bad examples before them. It’s amazing, don’t you think? History repeating itself over and over. I believe the prime reason for this kind of behavior is nature’s way of improving the gene pool.

We had a festive group at our house for a BBQ yesterday. The Walters Clan, The Cate clan, and new family member Jewel attended as did Diane’s Mom, Jean, who, if you remember, broke her wrist a little over a week ago. The brace provided by the orthodontist she visited helped a lot but we suspect her upcoming visit to an orthopedist will provide her with better broken bone management. She’s been told it may never heal, but what do orthodontists know. Teeth. That’s what they know. Not bones.

After all the eating was done we older members of society sat back and listened as the din of conversation subsided a little with each person who left. When all those who wear younger clothes were gone there was a brief sense of loss before the quiet seeped in. Then one of the neighbors set of a stick of dynamite that set off a bunch of car alarms.

Regarding dynamite. It’s apparently legal in Oregon. Only fireworks that leave the ground are illegal. So, of course, the majority of those exploding around us were airborne. Pretty, but totally illegal. Making it more fun is the uncut hay-field just below us. Thankfully, nothing caught on fire so I guess you could call it a successful 4th celebration.

Here’s an example of what transpired off to the south of our back porch.

Ziva, our black dog who enjoys lounging in bushes while outside, was very vocal about all the noise. Eventually she got used to it and only complained about the really loud ones that she could see and hear at the same time. She had a really good time, as did we.

This morning I visited my new physical therapist, Bret, who has already made my pain less. But, the day is not done.

My mission for today is to install our new tall toilet in my bathroom for Diane. She has trouble with short toilets. This will probably be an all day affair. I know because I’ve done it before and it always takes all day. For normal people it’s about a 30 minute job. Not me. I make it last because it’ so much fun. Last night I asked Diane if I should take the new toilet out of the box and put it in the bedroom so she could practice sitting on it, but she declined. I think she was afraid she might trip over it in the middle of the night while on her way to the short toilet. I would like to put the short toilet in the yard so we can use it for a Redneck BBQ and beer cooler combo … like this …

She’s not a fan. She won’t even consider making a planter out of it, like this …

Now, tell me. Who wouldn’t want something like that sitting on your front porch? I find it very welcoming and pleasant. But, no, we’ll just have to find someone in need of a short toilet and pass it along.

That’s about it for today.

Have a safe 5th as you finish off all those fireworks left over from yesterday.

News in the News

Posted on June 29, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

Amid all the shootings, and stories about people blowing each other up, is a scattering of nonsensical news items that make me pause and go, “Hmmm.”

First, I must tell you that I typically don’t watch the news and I rarely read the newspapers that are delivered to our door, so my news view is decidedly limited. Still, I have opinions about what I see when reading “Bing” news on my computer.

Using that handy doorway to the world I’m able to choose from many sources for any of the news items they deem noteworthy. I have my favorites, of course, but tend to look at the most recent entries available. I suspect the trivial items are included to dilute ones perception of news in general to keep their interest. You know, like scattering candy in a pile of crap to make it look more festive.

Take today, for instance. I’ve investigated the world and discovered that a “Popular Tucson TV Reporter Couple” have been charged with child abuse after their baby tested positive for cocaine. This was accomplished through the use of the former Miss Arizona contestant’s shapely left breast, while feeding her infant, after she ingested cocaine the previous evening. How fun. Now she’s newsworthy, but no longer reporting the news. Dumb.

Then there’s news about a Milwaukee woman who has been added to the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted list. She’s the suspect in the murder of her pregnant neighbor and her unborn infant because of loud music. One source indicated that Shanika, the suspect, is Milwaukee’s first fugitive on the ‘Ten Most Wanted List’, like it’s some kind of honor, like when the Bucks win a ball game. Kinda makes you want to move to Milwaukee, doesn’t it?

How about Mark Z, Mr. Facebook? He’s making all his new Kauai neighbors angry because he’s building a six-foot high wall around his 700 acre estate. That’s certainly noteworthy, don’t you think? His spokespeople said the wall is meant to be a sound barrier but I think it’s there to keep the wild pigs out. Or maybe keep them in. One resident of the island reported that she’s 5’8″ tall and when walking along the property all she can see is the rock wall instead of the Hawaiian scenery to which she’s accustom. They want Mark to tear down the wall because it’s an eye sore. I mean, really? It was built to code, using local rocks and, most likely, local artisans. I think it’s a nice looking wall. I also think a more simple solution to tearing it down would be for Mark to build platforms outside the wall, every 100 feet or so, where those who are less than 6′ tall can ascend above the wall and take in all of Mark’s natural beauty. Each ramp would have to have wheelchair access, of course.

For the sports minded folks, there’s news about LeBron James who declined his player option and is now a free agent. The reason, I surmise, is due to his inherently greedy nature that propels him to seek more and more money for his “talents”. Yes, he’s pretty good but, like all pro sports icons, waaaaaay overpaid for what they do. Declining the option, it is reported, James salary will increase from $24 million to $27.5 million a year, a modest 14.58% increase. Not bad for someone who already has far more money than he needs.

I know, I sound a bit bitter talking about stuff like that, and probably smacks a lot like socialism. That’s not really it for me. It’s just that I find it amazing that professional athletes, and most CEO’s make such obscene amounts of money each year when we severely under educated kids, many of whom don’t know what having a full belly is like. It’s just sad.

There are many more topics, of course, most of them about people getting shot and places being blown to smithereens. You know, fun things to read about. The topper for all of today’s news, for me, was finding out that there might be a Tetris Trilogy in our future.

Stunning news.

Cedric, Jewel, Diane, Doug, Junior, & Taylor

Posted on June 19, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

Gee! It’s been a week since my last post and I can’t comprehend that amount of time slipping past me without registering. Just a blink of the eye and it’s gone. Perhaps I had a bunch of naps which could account for some of that time, but certainly not a week. I don’t think. Now I must reflect and see if anything interesting happened. If not, I’ll make something up.

First up is Cedric. He was 19 years old last Monday, the 13th. If you’ve read a few of these, you may already know that he’s poised for a trip to the Great Lakes Naval Training Center next month to begin boot camp. He enlisted on the Delayed Entry Program (DEP) a few months ago but had to wait for a spot. He’s excited about getting on with his life and we’re happy that he is finding his way. There will be more news about his progress as information is made available to me.

Last Monday, the 14th, was a double duty day for me because I was out of the house shortly after 6am to go help put out flags around town. Why did we do that, you may ask? It was Flag Day. One of those days that not may folks know about any more. So, now you have it. Keep that in mind for next year. It’s not a paid holiday, but one that gives us another opportunity to pay tribute to our Stars and Stripes.

After flags were in place, I made a trip to the St. Helens Golf Course for another round with the Peal Boys, Doug and Junior. That’s always a fun time. I actually played a pretty good round, too. Had two pars, one of which was a potential birdie. My drive made it to the green, something I’ve never done before. What fun is that!? Jimmie O wants to team up for a round at Wildwood soon so I’ll have an opportunity to see if I can survive 18 holes. There will be a report on that later, too, if I do good.

After golfing, we had a McBurgerville lunch then Doug dropped me by the doctor’s office for a scheduled visit with my cardiologist. This was the followup regarding the cardiac event I had a few weeks ago. I think it was a few weeks ago. I forget. Perhaps some of those brain cells that help me remember stuff got messed up somewhere along the road. That happens, and it’s OK. We all forget stuff. The one thing about forgetting stuff is where I am doing something up stairs and find I need “something” that’s in the basement but can’t remember what it is when I get down there. When that happens I walk around in my work shop and talk to my tools, and random pieces of wood, trying to get some help from them to remind me what I’m after. Generally I remember and find what I want, but sometimes I just find something else more interesting that what I was previously doing. When Diane discovers that I’m missing, she gets me back on track to finish the original task. She knows I forget, and I told her that it’s really only going to be a problem if I rush from the living room to the bathroom than can’t remember why I went there. I believe she has a stash of Depends somewhere to assist when that moment comes.

Thursday morning I had coffee with my friend, Larry. My other friend Larry played hooky so we didn’t have a quorum for the weekly meeting. Got to have three in case something comes up for a vote to ensure we don’t wind up with a tie. I believe the rest of that day was spent slumbering. I’m not sure. Diane may know. You’ll have to ask.

Friday we made a trip to Scappoose to pick up Jewel, our new gardener and dog sitter. She’s been on Hawaii, the Big Island, for the last 38 years, or so, (I’m guessing, of course), and is pretty much a native of Kailua/Kona. Coming back to the NW is like coming home for her. Thankfully the weather has cooperated, giving her a warm welcome. The sad thing about her return is that when we visit Kona we won’t have her to visit with. Because of that we may just not ever go there again. The good thing about her being here is she likes our dogs and she likes to pull weeds so we are applying a lot of pressure on her to just come live with us, like forever, or at least until she gets settled. She and I graduated from Scappoose High School together and it’s fun getting reacquainted after all these years. Because she was our Prom Queen I didn’t have a chance of ever dating her and now, look! We’re living together. It’s ok, though, because she and Diane are long time friends.

Friday afternoon we all went to the Riverfest Beer Garden down by the old court-house where we attended a OLCC training session about checking IDs for folks entering the area. We had to do that because Diane signed us up for a two-hour stint Friday evening. The training we received amounted to someone reading us a brochure that indicated the necessity of ensuring only competent adults were allowed in to drink beer then quickly shifted to “Signs of Visible Intoxication”. Here they are:

Bloodshot, glassy eyes
Slurred speech
Spilling drinks
Rambling conversation, loss of train of thought
Difficulty handling money, picking up change
Lack of focus and eye contact
Difficulty standing up
Stumbling
Swaying, staggering
Speaking loudly, then quietly
Difficulty remembering
Slow response to questions

After that list is a reminder to the trainee that drinking while on duty is against the law because serving alcohol responsibly requires a clear head. That kind of got me because we weren’t serving alcohol. We were just checking IDs. Still, it was part of the training. After that little pause, another bulleted list of “More Signs of Visible Intoxication”.

Can’t find mouth with glass
Mussed hair
Disheveled clothing
Loud and unruly
Urging other people to have another drink
Annoying other guests or servers
Aggressive or belligerent
Making inappropriate comments about others
Foul language
Sullen, moody

After having all of this read to us I was convinced that the list was made specifically for me because I have almost every one of those problems without ever consuming alcohol. The first set of bullets apply to me from the time I get up in the morning until after I have my afternoon meal. After the meal, the bottom set of bullets apply. Except for the foul language. I don’t do that. Can’t say I’ve never been guilty of that, but I don’t practice that form of communication any more. It’s not productive. Diane said.

While at Riverfest, I had a chance to greet Taylor and find out how school in Las Vegas is going for her. She was working in her Mom’s Yo Place Frozen Yogurt trailer.

Yesterday was a fun day in the yard for all of us. Jewel is a gem, no pun intended, and a hard worker. It’s to our advantage that she loves digging in the dirt. Diane decided that she would try mowing the lawn which turned into an adventure for both her, and me. I found some really good face masks that allowed her to be in the open air, covered with grass clippings, and still breathe normally. Without it she would have been so choked up she’d’ve had to stay in side. Grass is her main nemesis. That and strong perfume.

Anyway, I got her moving on the lawn mower, after jump starting it, then turned her loose. Since I forgot to show her about putting the ignition key in the correct position for mowing in reverse, I had to drag a battery and cables to her and get the mower going again. Then she did an absolutely perfect job mowing the front yard. Things went south when she moved around to the side yard and she discovered that getting around trees posed a problem for novice lawn mowers. First, she ran into the holly tree and killed the engine. That required another jump-start. Then she dropped one of the front wheels into a hole and killed the engine for another jump-start. The last one was when she got tangled up in the grape vines and couldn’t extract herself. Another jump-start. It got to the point that whenever I heard the mower stop I just deserted my blackberry vine eradication efforts and took the batter to wherever she was. The most entertaining episode, however, didn’t involve a killing the engine, but almost killing herself, so to speak. She was mowing around a low hanging forsythia, thinking it couldn’t be all that hard to slowly mow under the dangling branches. I just happened to look up and saw her flying out from under the branches at full speed, leaning back as far as she could to avoid contact, and it looked like she was riding a bucking bronco. All she would have had to do was put one hand in the air to prove she wasn’t hanging on with both hands. What happened was when she leaned back she pushed the forward hydrostatic clutch lever all the way down and didn’t realize it as she fought to extract herself from the scratchy branches with minimal injury. It took her a good 30 feet to stop because she was going downhill, and when I got to her she was in hysterics, having a great time. It was really funny, and I’m glad she didn’t hurt herself. Just wish I could’ve had a video camera at the ready when I saw her take off.

Since nothing can top the mower episode, I’m going to quit. Diane’s looking forward to finishing up the back yard tomorrow. I’ll be standing by with the camera this time.

Cheers!

Yesterday, Last Night, & This Morning

Posted on May 18, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

Diane was released from the County Courthouse this morning and she got home at 0450 after 18 straight hours on the job. She was very tired when she drug herself through the front door (which I left unlocked for her). This was expected, however, because it’s a long drawn out process with specific requirements for each step involved. I don’t know them all, since I’m not a member of that inner circle, but I can speculate about what I “think” I know.

Like, signatures. Every ballot is signed by the voter and the signature is validated by one of the volunteers against a database of voters signatures which are kept in a special vault by the men’s bathroom. That’s unfortunate because the person who does the counting isn’t technically allowed to use the men’s restroom due to the nature of her physical characteristics.

Regarding that … bathrooms. There’s such a huge argument about which bathroom a transgender person should use which I think is totally asinine. Instead of building new restrooms for to accommodate people who aren’t quite sure which one to use, why not just rip out all the fixtures in public facility restrooms and install porta pottys. They are private and every gender imaginable can use them. In schools, for safety, I suspect they should be bolted to the floor so no one can tip them over.

Another alternative would be to build a separate structure, like I’ve seen in some campgrounds, that has a row of doors on each side that doesn’t indicate gender. Each door opens to a small private bathroom that can be used on a first come, first served basis. The signage on the door is either “Occupied” or “Available”. For students who can’t read, “Occupied” is RED, and “Available” is GREEN which has universal meaning all its own. For those who are both illiterate and color blind, there is always the simple test of trying to open the door. If it opens and there’s someone else already in there, they obviously don’t care if they have visitors regardless of gender. Or, they just forgot to lock the door. I’m sure the School Board would be open to establishing a special class to teach students how to recognize simple clues like I’ve mentioned in order to avoid a law suit. Pretty simple. Sadly, anything that requires a committee always winds up being complicated and expensive.

I’m sure that some of you are wondering what I was doing while Diane was working so hard. Well, I think I mentioned that I mowed all three acres of our lawn during the early afternoon, then I took Cedric to his DEP (Delayed Entry Program) meeting at the Navy recruiter’s office by the Hillsboro airport. While he was inside learning, I steeped a couple of doors down and had a wonderful Chinese meal of orange chicken and noodles for $8 at a very small establishment. One of those little family run holds in the wall places. Beats the commercial outfits every time. Then I sat in the Diane’s truck, which allowed me to drive, and read my book until my iPad ran out of juice. Then I drove Cedric to the Scappoose McDonald’s where he bought his supper, then dropped him at Grace Baptist Church where he helps with their Youth Group. The entire Walters family helps with all of the Youth Groups at church. They are busy.

Then I went home and let dogs out. Yes, I’m the one who lets the dogs out. That song is about me.

After fiddling with Diane’s fancy remote – she has one of those Xfinity things that you can talk to – I decided to just watch one of the movies I had recorded. It was “Tomorrowland”. I really liked it and would like to watch it again with Diane, when she wakes up. I also watched “Ant Man”, which was OK, but not something Diane would enjoy, and three episodes of “Quantico”. There might have been an episode of “Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.” in there, too. It’s a little hazy.

The weather changed this afternoon, after we finished golfing. Went to the course at 0900 this morning, dog tired, and did pretty good. Can’t tell you what my score was because that’s not important. I can report, however, that I nearly had a birdie (got a par instead), and I only had 8 on one hole. The rest of them were 5’s and 6’s, maybe one 7, too. After golf we (Doug, Junior, and me) went to Burgerville for lunch and talked briefly about all the folks our age who are checking out to The Great Beyond which is a song by R.E.M and an Australian store that sell clothing made from bamboo. Who knew? For the purposes of my narrative, I mean that they died. Perhaps you knew that, but I had to clarify. Most recently was the lost of another class mate who decided to end it himself. No one I’ve talked with, so far, understands why. Then, Junior’s neighbor died and he’s been asked to be a pall bearer. All this is happening not long after Junior and Doug lost their very good friend, Mike Barnes. Golfing is a good way for us all to put all those dark thoughts aside and enjoy the day.

I think this is enough.

Oh! Tomorrow Diane and I are going to The Dalles to watch the St. Helens Lady Lions varsity softball team participate in a playoff game for state. Lydia and her friend, Ceirra, were both called up to play so we will, naturally, go watch. It’s only a simple 2.5 hour drive, but that’s one of Diane’s favorite things to do. No one expects the team to advance very far, but you just never know which way that ball will bounce. So, we go.

Sheetrock, Urgent Care, Family, & Fun

Posted on May 14, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

As some of you already know, thanks to my first wife posting on Facebook, I had an adventurous Thursday. It all began at Jack’s house, where I was helping him put up sheet rock. It was only my second day on the job and I was just standing there, minding my own business when I had one of my tachycardia events. I’ve been having those things for years and find them to be non-threatening because they don’t hurt. My heart just flutters a little. They started while I was in the Navy and the doc then told me that I was having PVC’s, which everyone knows is plastic pipe used for in ground sprinklers and others tasks for moving water. That’s now. Back then there was no PVC piping so it was evident the doctor meant Premature Ventricular Contractions. I was told my PVC events were happening only every 5th beat of my heart and they only worry about it when it’s every 3rd beat. When they happen I feel like I’m raising up, like a floaty sensation. It’s brief, and a couple of deep breaths brings everything back to normal.

So, it’s nothing new. On Thursday, however, I think my PVC’s, which hadn’t happened for a long time, decided to catch up a little and hammered me with, maybe every other beat. It was amazing! For about 5 seconds, it felt like my heart was beating on the walls, trying escape, not that little flutter letting me know it was there. Plus, instead of the floaty feeling it was evident that I wasn’t going to maintain my current vertical position as my vision went dark and I started to fall. It was definitely as sinking feeling. Fortunately, there was a stool next to me and I was able to guide myself to a sitting position. As soon as I sat down everything went back to normal. Freaky!

We went back to work and hung another sheet of sheet rock before I could no longer disregard the analytics my mind was providing of possible side effects of what happened. Like a tingly sensation on the left side of my neck, and possible pain in my left arm pit. Stuff like that. The arm pain was difficult to analyze because of my torn rotator cuffs, so there was some discussion inside my head as to what was always there vs. what was new.

I decided that the only way to resolve the discussion was to take a trip to urgent care in St. Helens and see what they thought. Wynette wanted to drive me but I declined because I had my old truck at their house and was concerned about transportation back once I was done at urgent care.

Let me tell you, right now, that going to urgent care with my set of symptoms is the totally wrong thing to do. They took me into their care, getting me right in to a room, stuck a bunch of probes on my body, inserted an IV cath in my left arm, all the while scolding me for not calling 911 instead of driving all the way back to St. Helens from Scappoose which is 8 miles further away from the hospital they were going to send me to. Whew! It was all done in a nice, concerned way, but I got it from every one of them. I tried to explain that I’ve ALWAYS driven myself to Urgent Care in the past for mishaps and they said, “But those times you were bleeding, and we can fix that. We can’t fix hearts!”

Did I mention that they know me there?

So, as I lay on the gurney, waiting for the ambulance, I called the Columbia County Courthouse where Diane was due in court to face spousal abuse charges … that’s a lie. She was there working on the Counting Board for the elections. She does this for every election because they pay her $9 an hour. I tried her cell phone first, knowing she wouldn’t answer because she was working, then I called the County Clerk’s office and asked that they give Diane a message that I was at urgent care waiting to be transported to Emanuel Hospital. I was told to wait, and very soon thereafter Diane was on the phone so I could explain what was going on. I hated interrupting her at work because we can use the extra cash, but I really had no choice. If I had waited until I got to Emanuel it would have been far worse. Believe me. I know stuff like that.

Diane came to Urgent Care and watched Jim and Ken stuff me into the ambulance the drive away. It’ the first time I’ve ever been on an ambulance ride. Jim rode in back while Ken drove and we had a very nice visit on the trip to town. It was almost like we were just going shopping.

In no time at all, it seemed, we were there and my fantasy ride was over. One more thing to check off my bucket list. Jim and Ken placed me into the tender care of a bevy of bright and shiny nurses, PA’s, and a doctor to whom I individually related the story of what happened to me. I had to do this about 4 times and I was beginning to think it was a test to make sure I gave them the same info each time. It was ok, though, because everyone was extremely friendly and it was evident they liked their jobs and had my best interest at heart, no pun intended.

They sucked blood from my IV, sent me to have an X-ray, connected me to an EKG, gave me aspirin and water, made me just lay there while they bustled all around. They were busy all the time, and always smiling. I deemed it my job to ensure they continued to keep smiling. It’s what I do. I didn’t give them grief and did exactly everything I was told. I was a good patient. One of the RN’s, Michelle, told me I was the cleanest and best patient she’d had all day. Made me proud.

Diane was allowed back to sit with me as they worked so we had a chance to visit. She was worried, I know, and I was sorry for that. Jennifer, who was working in Hillsboro, at Nike, left early and showed up to be with me, also. Jeff would have also come, but I talked with him and eased his concern. He got the old truck home for me which was a huge help. I have a good family.

The process had already started to check enzymes in my blood that indicate heart damage and I’d need three of those, 6 hours apart. That meant the last test would be taken around 1 am the next morning. So, they decided that I should just spend the night for observation in one of their ER holding cells adjacent to the main ER area. It’s an observation area of individual small rooms that are nicer than some motels we’ve visited. Diane was initially going to try spending the night in the room’s recliner until it was decided that I wouldn’t be released until after 9 am in the morning. Jennifer was in the room with us and made sure I minded the nurses and doctors and not make a joke of my current situation. She said, “Dad, remember how old you are” more than once, as a way of saying I’m a bit more fragile than I used to be when I swung her in circles, and tossed her into the air.

Yes, the old body is starting to fall apart, I fear, but it’s hard to not make it fun. It happens to us all and we only get to experience it once so why not enjoy it, if possible? I realize there are times when I should be serious, but I have this reputation to maintain, you know? I’m rarely serious about my predicaments.

Soon, I was alone in my holding cell. I had my iPad (thanks to my lovely bride), and a nice big TV on the wall, and a menu. Yes, a menu from which I was to select my dinner. That was an unexpected treat. I thought I would just get what I got and eat it or go hungry. Nope. I had a menu with a stunning array of heart healthy choices for dinner. I chose the rib eye steak, oven roasted potatoes, green beans, raspberry sorbet, orange juice, and a dinner salad. Yes, that’s all true. Here, let me show you.

Pretty snazzy, huh? When the girl came to the door with it she knocked and said, “Room service.” Honest to God. Room service. And it was pretty awesome. I ate every bit of it and almost licked my plates.

Then I watched the Oklahoma Thunder beat San Antonio Spurs to move to the next round of the NBA playoffs. Regarding that, since the Golden State Warriors beat the Portland Trailblazers in 5 games, I’ll be cheering for them. Next round is Stephen Curry (GSW) against Russel Westbrook (OT). Should be fun.

After the game I settled down with my iPad. Thankfully it was charged all the way so figured it should last the night.

My nurse, Arlene, came in to tell me my first enzyme test was negative, which was a good thing. Then she took more blood for the next test. I read and dozed, gave blood and got good news on the last draw, and the cycle repeated throughout the night. Finally, at 0645 Friday morning Arlene told me the last test was also negative and suggested that I order breakfast, which I did. It was a breakfast sandwich of just egg and cheese. No meat. I only ate it down to the part where the eggs were green. I know it was still OK, that the green tinge was from cooking in an aluminum pan, but my head wouldn’t cooperate with my taste buds in the end so I left about half of it because I was suddenly no longer hungry. Then I napped some more.

Diane returned to get me about 0900, and they released me around 1030 with written instructions to not drive or operate dangerous equipment until a final determination could be made for why I had my event. They called it Syncope, or “Near Fainting Experience”. I looked it up. The fact that they actually had a name for it comforted me, knowing other folks do this, too.

Yesterday was Lydia’s last HS softball game for the year and I was happy to be there to cheer her on. She was the starting pitcher and blanked Rex Putman through 4 innings. It was 13-4 when she was relieved and assumed duties at third base. Her relief, Ciara, closed them out in the top of the 5th, and our girls scored in the bottom making it 14-4 and the end of the game using the 10 run rule. Jack and Wynette attended the game, too, so we got to visit and cheer the girls on. The fun continued after the game when we all adjourned Campbell Park and went to McCormick Park for the girls’ end of season party. That’s where the girls play a game against the parents and knock their socks off, until the pizza arrived. It was a lot of totally unorganized fun. Diane and I just sat and watched, enjoying the interactions.

Now I’m on another forced day of rest (Diane said) so mowing the lawn is not an option. I was going to do it yesterday but that was DEFINITELY not going to happen (Diane said). So, I’ll work on that bucket list and check of one more item – this was the first time I’ve ever spent the night in a hospital. It’s not a restful experience, but it was truly interesting to be involved as a participant in the ballet that is a top-notch emergency room. Very impressive stuff.

Thanks to all of you who expressed concern for my welfare. You can relax, now, as I’m about as good as I can get and I’m in pretty good shape for the shape I’m in.

Happy Mother’s Day & NAS Lemoore to Carlsbad, CA

Posted on May 8, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

I have every confidence in the world that each and every one of you woke up this morning with your Mother on your mind. If you didn’t, shame on you. Please stop and, if possible, call her right now. I’ll wait.

***long pause***

Thank you.

My mother left us in 2001 but I still think of her every day. She is missed, and I’m sure she knows it.

We spent the morning at church, then joined four of the Walters clan for lunch at El Tapatio. I ordered the El Tapatio Burrito forgetting how huge that thing is. I did a pretty good job on it but had to take some home for tomorrow. Perhaps it will be photogenic when I dump it on a plate before putting it in the micro.

Here’s part of the church service …

That’s our friend, Nancy. She was kind of laid back during the sermon.

After lunch we all came back to the house to visit until 2:30 pm. That was the time chosen to depart for the movie that Cedric was treating everyone to. What a guy. It was for his Mom, but I was invited, so I went. It was Captain America – Civil War. Diane and her Mom aren’t so much into those kind of action movies, but I really enjoyed it. Lots of fun.

Now we must leave Lemoore, in our minds. So, close your eyes and have someone read this to you.

I think we left Lemoore around 9:30 am which seems to be our new departure time. The GPS Lady reported that the drive to Carlsbad would take about 5 hours but I don’t think she took into account that we’d be moving through Los Angeles in mid afternoon. Perhaps she did consider that and considered it a push because, as everyone in the universe knows, traffic in Los Angeles is in rush hour mode all the time. It’s quite amazing, really. Normally accidents on I-5 through LA are non-injury because no one is going fast enough to do more that dent things up and make tempers flare more than usual. Fortunately, we didn’t witness any mishaps and made it to our destination unscathed. I believe our success on freeways is due to the fact that we just get in the right lane and stay our of the line of fire. It works well and we get where we’re going in plenty of time with little stress.

On a personal note, I’m the one who drove the LA segment of the trip and I did great! I’m taking credit for that “unscathed” part mentioned previously. Diane put her book down frequently, but remained calm which helped me maintain my composure. Every once in a while, when I was behind someone going the speed limit, she would say, “take him,” so I would. But I did it gently so I wouldn’t mess up the gas mileage too badly.

The Seapointe Resort is a nice place but the photos on their website depicting the facility are a bit misleading. If you check it out the one of the pool looking toward the ocean makes one think it’s right there. What you don’t see is the four lanes of Carlsbad Blvd you have to cross. After doing that, you must clamber down a cliff (I’m sure there are stairs along there somewhere) to the beach. An easier way would be to drive and park on a low spot in the Blvd that has immediate beach access.

We didn’t do that. Instead, we drove north to Oceanside to walk their board walk. It was very restful and allowed us to get our beach fix when needed.

One day we went looking for thrift stores and/or flea markets and found one on the main road just down the street. Upon entering we were convinced that it was run mainly by children of old hippies. They were having a fashion show that was pretty entertaining. The only thing I can remember us getting was a hat for me. It’s called a pub hat and I’ve never had one. What’s interesting is that it’s 55% hemp and 45% organic cotton. I’m not sure, but I think the “organic” part means the cotton was grown in dirt. The brand name is “Hempy’s” and it’s made in the USA. I figured it would be a good golf hat. It’s very comfortable.

Mostly what we did was relax and read with no distractions. It was very nice, but a week was plenty long enough for us, then we headed back home. I won’t bore you with that part of our trip because it was pretty uneventful. Just lots of driving, something we also enjoy. We think the trip is sometimes better than the stay. It’s in our blood.

Once home my first priority was to get the lawn mowed as quickly as possible before it rained. While I was doing that out back, Diane worked on the wild parts out front. The below photo is a triangular spot, about 15 feet on a side. That’s Ziva peeking out of the jungle. She’s decided it’s kind of nice to just lay down in a bunch of foliage. Funny dog.

Now it’s time to stop. Diane said. So, of course, I will.

Bye.

First, however, I just have to say that I think Dwayne Wade, of the Miami Heat, is a totally disrespectful idiot. That’s an opinion, but it’s supported by video evidence of him taking practice shots while a young girl sang a beautiful rendition of the Canadian National Anthem. What a shmuck. Thankfully, the Toronto Raptors won the game and is up 3-1 in the series.

Baylee’s 7, NAS Lemoore, & Other Stuff

Posted on May 7, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

Today our daughter, Jennifer, her daughter, Lydia, and Jeff’s daughter, Baylee, went shopping with my Mother-in-law’s daughter, Diane. That’s 4 generations of girls heading to the big city with credit cards. The occasion is Baylee’s yearly trip with the girls to celebrate her birthday which was last Saturday, while we were gone. It’s a “thing” Diane does with the girls and they seem to love it. Four generations of girls shopping, having a nice lunch, and just hanging out. You know. Sounds fun. I stayed home and mowed the lawn.

If I’m allowed to know what they did, after the fact, I’ll share.

Let’s see … NAS Lemoore … I believe that’s where I left off yesterday.

The drive south from Dunsmuir was uneventful and I really don’t have a lot to share. Diane drove the first two hours, I drove the next three, then she finished off with almost two more. Did you get that part where I drove three hours? Straight? All by myself? This is a new aspect to our traveling routine where I normally sit in the Navigator’s chair, and Diane drives. With a really good GPS system, being the Navigator means I must sit quietly when turns are coming up so Diane can hear the instruction provided by the GPS lady. We haven’t named her yet. That gives me plenty of time to read, which I do, and just look at stuff zooming by. Eventually the truck stops and I look up to see that we’ve arrived someplace. I admit that I actually know the destination because I’m the one who programs it. I have this handy app on my phone that allows me to send destinations to the vehicle’s navigation system.

On a side note, Diane’s truck gets pretty good gas mileage. On one 50 mile stretch it got almost 32 mpg. The overall average for the trip was almost 21 mpg. The old pickup gets about 9 mpg, all the time, so we are pleased.

The high temperature today was 86 degrees. Right now it’s only 85 so it must be cooling off for the evening. As a native Oregonian I have to say that 86 degrees is too hot. It would be OK if it rained and cooled things off a bit now and then but it doesn’t. It’s either hot like that, or wet. In between those two is horrendous humidity. Well, not horrendous really, but bad enough that I briefly thought it was.

Since I was all alone all day I had to make my own lunch so I heated up some green beans and what I’m pretty sure was some left over meat loaf. It was pretty good.

I’ve whittled away the day by mowing the back yard, our neighbor’s back yard, and by cleaning up the fan I’m going to install in the trailer. The girls are home safely so I can put away my worries and watch the Blazers play Golden State.

Carl The Waiter

Posted on April 24, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

If you ever find yourself out near Mall 205 which is, oddly, next to I-205, and thoughts of Italian food tickle your taste buds, you might find it worth your time to stop at the Olive Garden. We did that last Friday after Lydia’s soft ball team waxed Rex Putman High School 16-0. It’s the first time they’ve beat them so it was a serious victory and we celebrated.

We also celebrated Diane’s and my 48th anniversary, and Daniel’s birthday (a little early). We all had excellent meals and it was topped off when our waiter, Carl, asked if he could sing us a song. Thinking it was going to be Happy Birthday, we said sure. To our surprise, and delight, Carl thought a bit, started snapping his fingers, and treated us, and everyone in our vicinity, with a stellar rendition of Frank Sinatra’s “You Make Me Feel So Young”. He was incredible and caused everyone around us to stop eating so they could just listen. This guy should be on Broadway.

So, if you go to this Olive Garden, ask to be seated in Carl’s serving area. It’s his full-time job. Why, with that talent, we don’t know. But he’s happy.

Ask him to sing a song.

Lydia’s 17! Already? … and other stuff …

Posted on March 27, 2016 by Jerrie Cate

Yesterday was Lydia’s 17th birthday. I know that’s true because I distinctly remember celebrating her 16th birthday about this time a year ago. Also, everyone was congratulating her on her 17th birthday making it even more clear to me. Here’s Lydia with her two best buds, Georgie and Ceirra.

Lydia’s party was held at the tea house in St. Helens where we ate tiny little sandwiches with interesting innards (one with curry that tricked me into thinking I was eating egg salad), various flavors of tea (all very good), many kinds of desserts (all good), and great service. Georgie, Lydia’s good friend, who works at the tea house, sat at the table with us to ensure we had the best service. We did, of course.

Georgie in her working uniform. The British flag apron is significant because her Mom, Jacqui, is from England and that’s where Georgie is going to college after graduating this year.

Maryssa, our only niece, has been tearing up the ball park with home runs lately. It all started when Diane and I were present at her game here in Oregon where she hit her first collegiate homer. A monster at the plate, she is.

Cedric will be leaving for boot camp mid April. He’s very excited about getting on with his life and a possible Navy career. We’re excited for him. Until he gets the call telling him when his departure date will be, he’s just hanging out …

Actually, he’s grabbing some rest after helping monitor the task of hiding eggs for the little girls. It is Easter, you know. So, Happy Easter.

The kids, big and little, all had a terrific time hiding the eggs (plastic ones with candy inside) then helping them find them. When that was done, the little girls got to hide eggs for the big kids. It was a great time. Lots of energy. The difference in the eggs is that the big kid eggs had money inside, not candy. Since Cedric is leaving soon for a paying job in the Navy, he gave the money he found to his sister, Lydia. What a guy.

Now, I’ll end with some pictures of all the fun they had, then I’m going to bed.

This is the Blackwood Legacy gospel group from Nashville. They blessed our little church last Wednesday evening with a 2 hour concert that blew our socks off. These guys are terrific. If you ever have the chance to see the in person, do so, by all means. They are (left to right) Paul, Hunter, Rick, and Luke. Amazing artists.

Jennie’s brother, Jeff, enjoying a cup of tea at Lydia’s party. The tea was pretty awesome.

Ceirra, Lydia, and Georgie

A plate of food before it was rapidly decimated

The girls, again

Gilligan and Jennie

This is, like, the best T-shirt ever for Lydia

More of the food. I must admit that I had my very first jelly and banana sandwich here and it was actually pretty good. Who knew? This is a photo of Diane’s hand headed for the plate to grab something.

Gilligan in full sprint mode looking for eggs

Little kids off to hide eggs for the big kids, Baylee in the lead

This is out of sequence, because I think it’s big kids hiding eggs for little kids.

Just checking to see if you’re still awake. I have no idea who this is, but he, or she, has pretty much hit the limit, I’d say. I suspect getting an MRI, should the need arise, probably won’t happen.