My Burn Pile, “Jason Bourne”, Dirt, Hamburgers, and Dog Greetings

Today I donned my Dickies and worked in the dirt for a while after feasting on toast and Cheerios, with brown sugar. I ate first because I know Diane would have told me to do so had she been home, but she was in Portland with her Mom, Jean, who had a doctor’s appointment. She would have been proud that I thought about eating all by myself. Most of the time I just wait until I’m told to go wash because lunch or dinner are ready. It’s something I’m used to what with having two ladies living in the house. One of them is always cooking something, which works great for me. Also, when one cooks, generally, the other one does the dishes. I know that, having shared that, I will certainly be put on the rotation for dishes. Truth is, I do the dishes quite often. I also cook once in a while. I’m “that” guy.

The sum result of my morning was to remove all the piles of yard debris from the edge of the yard, where Jewel stacks it, and transport it to the burn pile. Unfortunately, the burning season won’t start again until October so it’s going to be pretty large by then. It’s pretty large now.

Actually, I emptied a yard of bulk potting soil from the pickup, too. One shovel full at a time.

This afternoon, we watched “Jason Bourne” at the Scappoose Cinema 7 because it was Cheap Senior Day. Actually, it was cheap for everyone because all tickets were $5. We got there a little later than desired because I had to clean myself up after working in the yard, pulling stumps, and such. That resulted in the need for the three of us to sit closer to the screen than our little eyes liked. If you’ve seen the movie you know there’s a lot of action going on and the fast camera motion when you’re up close makes my eyeballs wobble around too much.

Although the movie only cost $5 for everyone who attended, most of them were old folks. One of them appeared to have brought they grandchildren to watch this R rated movie which we thought was a bit odd. Wonder if Mom & Dad knew. Maybe they will find out when the kids get home and start ratting out Grandma.

Another reason for getting to the theater early on old people day is to ensure you get a seat in the middle of the row you select because that’s generally where the old folks with small bladders sit. If you’re on the end it’s quite probably that you will be treated to an overweight person sliding their butts across your face as they step on your toes in their hurry to get to the bathroom. That only happened once. On the way back-end that lady just took her time.

On the way out of the theater we encountered a frenzied group of theater employees frantically working to stem the leak in the women’s bathroom. It must have been a couple of inches deep on the floor. It’s my theory that the lady who rushed that direction in the middle of the movie tried to flush her depends down the toilet without success. Just guessing, of course. There was no proof that I could see, but I didn’t look long.

For dinner Diane took us to Burgerville in St. Helens for some nutritious hamburger meat from Venezuela. That’s a lie, of course, because everyone knows that Burgerville only uses cows who used to live in Oregon and Washington, and maybe Northern California. We ate there so the dogs wouldn’t know about it. If we had taken the meal home they would have been harassing us for little bites of meat and french fries. They always do that.

It didn’t matter because when we got home all they wanted to hear about was the movie and when it would be on HBO so they could watch it. There was no talk about hamburgers at all. All they did was greet us in the same exuberant manner they use every time we’re gone from the house more than 5 minutes. Ziva has the need to put her hands on me which sometimes results in damage to my exterior. Here’s the results of one of her hello’s:

She did that with just one foot. It was a double tap that she just couldn’t control. If my skin wasn’t so crepe papery I may not have bled at all. I would have just had a bunch of hematomas.

Since I had to put the old truck in the back yard to facilitate removal of the dirt we purchased, I decided it’s just as well that I leave it there. That way I can just use it to jump-start the lawn mower when I need to use it. Logic says that getting a new battery for the mower would be the more expedient solution, but logic doesn’t necessarily factor in to many of the decisions I make day in and day out.